#i get that we all have daddy issues but can we please dig a little deeper here

[sleepfight]

My kingdom for a Halsin/Whoever fic where Halsin is actually a person with his own flaws, wants, needs, and sorrows and not just a piece of handsome cardboard that speaks like a modern therapist and who cares only for healing his partner's trauma, never ever asking for anything he desires, content to give but never take. Like cmon you can even work that kind of vibe with his backstory no problemo but rather than exploring why, it's always just a given that Halsin doesn't need anything and is perfectly happy to let his whole life revolve around his lover(s)

[foreverisntenough]

‘OURS’

Summary: You were his and he was yours but what would it be like adding one more? Thrust into a whirlwind romance you never could’ve imagined that became your forever love. You continue building a new life across the pond with a very beautiful Scouser. A sequel to the ‘You’re Mine’ fic.

INDEX

Warnings: This series is 18+ and will contain fluff, suggestion, SMUT (unprotected sex,) pregnancy, parenting, mental health struggles, eating disorder, self doubt, body image issues, daddy kink, angst, alcohol consumption - not sure what else really… if i miss anything please lmk!

Note: Thank you for reading! Please be sure to like, comment, or message me what you think of the series! Try not to nitpick with any real pregnant/ baby logistics it’s better if you just read along happily :)

Chapter 29 - Another Fall Baby | ‘Ours’

word count - 11.8 k

Another day, another morning filled with Teddy’s giggles echoing in your kitchen. Trent was chasing her around the island counter as you tried to dodge them, multitasking making Trent’s protein shake and Teddys pancakes for their respective breakfasts. This was their thing lately. Teddy liked to think she was going at the same speed in your kitchen that she was watching Trent run on the pitch during his matches every weekend. She assumed he was trying just as hard with her. She assumed she was just as fast as him. Trent wasn’t going to tell her otherwise. It was fun and he wanted her to believe she was that fast, he wasn’t going to be the one to burst her bubble. He was off to training after you all would eat. You had your first appointment for your pregnancy with your doctor in a few short days. Today you planned on taking it easy and doing everything you could to avoid the anxiety you were feeling about that appointment. When the game of tag was finished and breakfasts were done you sat Teddy at the table to eat, getting her situated. Trent opted to stand at the countertop with you resting his chin onto your shoulder, one hand holding his shake, the other placed delicately over your stomach.

“Thank you for carrying another beautiful little baby for us.” Trent whispered only for you to hear, keeping his eyes locked on Teddy being her usual self, happily munching on the tiny pieces of pancakes you had cut up for her and a few strawberries. 

“Think he or she will be beautiful like her?” You asked sheepishly. Not really as a jab or a dig at his ability to make a cute baby more from a place of personal insecurity. What if your next baby looked more like you and wasn’t as cute as Trent’s carbon copy swaying her head back and forth with dramatic ‘mmms’ at the table right now?

“Yeah, I mean it’s impossible for them not to be really. They’ll look like us.” He continued on and you hummed. “Look at me baby. Any baby of mine has a pretty good shot at being cute.” He teased turning your chin with his hand to look at his correctly defined cute face. You rolled your eyes at his, though accurate, obnoxious cockiness about his appearance. “And there is a 100% chance any baby of yours will be gorgeous, alright?” He confirmed.

“I guess.” You mumbled out letting your eyes flutter closed for a moment, still worried. Trent’s cute comments definitely made you feel mildly better. They were sweet but you couldn’t shake your nerves entirely. 

“Looks aside, baby, because at the end of day that’s not really what I’m worried about, they are so lucky to have you as a mummy.” Trent cooed, turning you by gripping your hips, spinning you into him. You smiled up at him and pecked his lips draping your arms over his shoulders. “I didn’t know until I met you how bad I wanted this.  I didn’t know how important it’d be but this family, our children, I’ll do anything for us and more specifically you, pretty girl. You're everything, baby.” He cooed a particularly heavy and emotional comment.

“Yeah? I feel like everything was just in black and white till we had Teddy. Can you bear with a cheesy sentiment?” You looked at Trent with earnest eyes. He nodded, not entirely sure what he was signing up for but he’d always listen no questions asked. “I feel like my life was very static, it was all still photos with no movement and then I met you and it transformed into this movie. Everything began to flow and move. There was a score playing in each scene, like music. It just came to life and then when we had Teddy, it was like this gorgeous perfect movie flooded with color. I’m learning things all over again and appreciating them and the fact that I get to do it with you and her, I just keep falling in love with our life.  It’s different having a family of my own. It feels like I finally am…” you took a deep breath, snapping out of your emotions before finishing your soliloquy. “Healing.” You flicked your eyes that had been fixated out a window to the back garden through the monologue back to Trent.

“Wow… baby. Erm.” Trent blinked his eyes a few times, taken back by your really heartfelt and almost heartbreaking confessional. “I mean… you know I’m not as articulate with my words as you are so as much as I like to win I don’t think I could compete with that because honestly you speak as beautiful as you look, baby.” He dropped his hands around your waist and over the curve of your ass to the back of your thighs picking you up and placing you to sit on the countertop. He stepped in between your legs and cupped your face, coming closer. “I feel the exact same way. I couldn’t express it better but baby… I don’t think you realize that you’re the reason things in life began to transform into moving colors. You’re the one that brought on this metamorphosis. You’re not the girl I met on 78th street. You’re everything I imagine that girl wanted to be. You’re so strong. What you’ve been through, whether it be the physicality of bringing a child into this world or the strength you’ve shown to heal and manage your health. You’re so brave. You always tell me I am after big matches and that you're proud of me but honestly comparably it’s nothing to what you do day in and day out. I couldn’t be more proud of you simply for just being you.  Baby, what you provide Teddy and I is immeasurable. You are invaluable and you deserve to be living in a kaleidoscope world of color that I, by some higher power, got to be the lucky man that gets to give that to you and I hope I do.” Trent kept his voice quiet and despite your attempt to keep your tears at bay, they disobeyed your intentions and tumbled down your cheeks. You wrapped yourself around Trent and just breathed him in. 

“You do, T. I love you so much.” You pulled away from your hug with a smile and started to giggle. Trent looked at you with a confused smirk. “What the fuck was that? That was so emotional.” You kept laughing. You and Trent went from having breakfast to baring your souls. You wiped your face and Trent followed in your hands wake with his thumb catching a few stray tears. 

“What’s wrong, mama? Why sad?” Teddy yelled out, concerned seeing you and Trent. She pushed her little pink plate with a bit of food left on it forward away from her. 

“I’m okay, Teddy girl. Just talking to daddy. Are you all done?” You cooed, turning towards her and hoping off the counter. You went to move past Trent but he grabbed your arm and pulled you back into a bear hug swaying you back and forth. 

“Ted, do you know how much I love mummy?” Trent asked her, kissing your head in between words. Teddy hummed a disinterested ‘yeah huh.’ He released you after a few more kisses you weren’t complaining about. You went over to Teddy and sat in the seat next to her high chair. 

“Hey, mummy.” Trent called for you as he grabbed a water from the refrigerator for himself. “I liked that picture from the GQ shoot you gave me so I moved it from my car into my locker in the changies so I need a new one.” He explained walking over to the kitchen table. It was just a thing you did to make Trent smile one day. You had tucked a photo of you all into the visor on the driver's side in his car. Evidently he liked it enough to move it. It was common for footballers to keep a photo of their families in their spaces at the training center. You were fairly sure he already had one but you weren’t going to press. You’d happily give him more.  

“Hmm. Okay, do you just want the same one or a different photo?” You asked him, watching him come towards you two at the table. 

“Erm… doesn’t matter, I just need one that I look good in.” He cheekily replied and you rolled your eyes. “One that my baby bear looks adorable in.” He cooed, running his hand over Teddy’s head before he pulled a chair out and sat down with you two. You nodded in agreement. “And obviously one that you look beautiful in, got one of those for me, pretty girl?” Trent asked, sliding his chair closer to yours and reaching out to squeeze your thigh. 

“Yeah, I can find one for you, T.” You smiled at him, placing your hand over his on your leg. “Can you have one more bite for me please, cutie girl?” You asked Teddy sweetly, pushing her plate back towards her. Trent picked up her little fork and picked one of the sliced strawberries up with it moving it to Teddy. 

“No tank, dada. Done, mama, tay?” Teddy told you very matter of fact climbing off her chair. You furrowed your brow and turned to Trent. Teddy’s new found independence was a little funny but it also caught you fairly off guard every time it showed up. 

“Oh.. okay, I guess bye.” You laughed as you watched her run out of the dinning room and lay herself flat on the hardwood floors next to your dogs. “How are we going to tell her?” You quietly asked Trent, keeping your eyes on Teddy with the dogs. She was talking to them like it was a mutual back and forth conversation.

“I don’t know, baby. How do you do that? Like does she know how that works? I don’t want her to know what we get up to.” Trent didn’t like the idea of Teddy being anything but his baby. It was clearly equally as perplexing to him as it was to you about the new hurdle you were about to tackle becoming parents for the second time    

“Erm… no. Right?” You answered him quickly. You were open with Teddy. You weren’t avoiding the logistics of life, you’d explain things if she asked. You didn’t want her to be afraid to tell you or Trent anything. You wanted her to be comfortable but Trent… well, Trent wasn’t all that comfortable about the idea that Teddy would ever grow up to be anything but his little girl, bundle of joy, pure, naive, angelic. He wanted her to stay that way forever if it was possible. 

“I don’t know, I can't imagine that. I mean we have to be realistic. I don’t want any of the stork shit. She’s smarter than that so I think we tell her honestly. Like I want her to know what's up but also not what her parents get up to, does that make sense? I don’t… God, baby, I don’t know.” Trent babbled almost confusing himself more. 

“Well obviously. I’m not gonna be like oh daddy and I fuck, am I?” You quipped with an obnoxious smile. Trent rolled his eyes at your dramatics. “This is when I feel like a fucking child. We’re parents and I have no idea how you do something like this.” You echoed his babbling, leaning your head onto his shoulder feeling the weight of raising a child with a second in the house approaching. 

“Baby, alright. Just relax.” He hummed caressing your sides. “She’s smart, she'll understand it. I guess we just google what to do because I’m not fucking asking my mum how she told me.” Trent laughed and you followed him agreeing that you didn’t want to ask your parents either. This was something you’d have to do your own way. It was your family and you two dictated how you’d run the show in your own house. You assumed you might have to do this again at one point or another if you survived having two.  

“I can’t believe I’m pregnant. Like I am right?” You whispered to Trent hesitantly asking him. It was obvious you were but a part of you was both apprehensive and eager to get to your doctor's appointment. 

“Baby, we’ve taken literally like 10 tests here and have the appointment so soon. I am pretty damn sure though.” He whispered back with a breathy laugh.  

“I know, I just.. I don’t know.” You sighed, hiding your face in his neck. You heard Teddy scream chasing one of the dogs. You could hear them scamper across the hardwood floors. “Think we’re ready for one more?” You asked Trent with a smirk pulling at your lips seeing Teddy round the couch with a giggle. Trent hummed confirming that he thought you were before kissing your temple.   

You walked into the cinema after Trent had come home from training later that day after you had put Teddy down for her last nap before dinner. He was sat back on a big lounger reclined with a massage gun working it over his thigh muscles haphazardly and lazily. December was always such a busy month for him with football and his body was starting to feel it. Even after the work he’d do at AXA for recovery with staff he still needed more. He was sore and tired. 

“My poor baby.” You cooed, coming to stand in front of him with a pout. He gave you a sleepy smile and beckoned you to come sit with him by a simple head gesture. “Need my help?” You asked, coming to the end of his seat and then crawling towards him. You slid both of your hands up his thighs moving them high up to his groins. You took the massager out of his hand before he even had answered you.

“Yeah, I need you, baby.” He sighed. He let his head drop back onto the cushion behind him. You did this a fair bit with him. When Trent was too tired after a match or training, you’d do anything for him. He didn’t even ask, you’d do it unprovoked more often than not. Sometimes you’d sit at the end of the bed or even on the floor at the end of the couch rubbing his feet, things like that. You didn’t mind, you wanted to do it. You held your pouty bottom lip between your teeth after you turned the massage gun back on. You focused on moving it in just the way you knew he liked as you kneeled, resting your ass back on your heels in between his legs. Trent had his eyes almost closed until he realized that the view in front of him wasn’t one he wanted to miss. The way you were bent over massaging him dressed in your skimpy tank top had your boobs practically falling out of it. You definitely fell into a category of women whose boobs tended to change during pregnancies. Trent wasn’t complaining. He tried to be coy but he was shamelessly staring as your larger boobs jiggled with every movement, watching your hardened nipples press into the fabric. “Yeah, I really need you, baby.” Trent groaned quietly and at first you didn’t realize it was anything other than a confirmation that maybe he felt better having someone else massage his sore muscles for him until he gently pulled down the soft fabric of your top letting your tits fall out. He pulled you up to him and swiftly wrapped his lips around one of your now exposed nipples. God, he felt so good. His tongue swirled around the perky bud. You were swollen and sensitive and this was turning you on an ungodly amount.

“Can I sit on your lap, T?” You asked him after minutes of pleasure what sounded fairly innocent but you both knew what you were asking for was more than a place to sit. You could feel your panties getting progressively more soaked. Your hormones were a mess lately. You couldn’t contain your desire for him. 

“Nah, i want you to turn around f’me.” He instructed you and so you did, slightly confused but you’d always listen. You sat in between his legs facing forwards, your back to his chest with your top pulled down. He wasted no time, pulling said top over your head though leaving you in nothing. “Tell me you want me to?” He asked you as if you knew what he was talking about. You turned your head back to him and in the smirk pulling on his lips you knew he was up to something both no good and simultaneously amazing. You nodded sheepishly, biting your lip apprehensively not sure you were agreeing to. “Open your legs, yeah?” His eyes had a lust burning behind them. Hisone hand pulled one of your thighs helping you. He turned the massage gun back on and what he was about to do pinged in your brain immediately. You whimpered when he moved your panties to the side using the pulsating ball of the gun. 

“Oh my fucking god, T.” You whined when Trent pressed the button of the massage gun once again. The speed of the vibrations increased. You bucked your hips into nothing but the gun’s vibrations, moaning. He was fucking loving this. You could feel warm liquid from your soaking wet pussy run down the inside of your legs. 

“Can I speed it up a little more, hmm?” He hummed and you whined. You were practically shaking as you felt your orgasm come closer. “Gonna be a good girl?” He asked you as he pressed down on the button to turn the vibrations up again. You nodded as he did it. Your back arched off of his chest. Shockwaves ran through your entire body while he moved the ball of the gun from your clit down to play with your entrance and then back up and around your clit.  Your orgasm came crashing over you unannounced. You could feel your juices leak from you but you couldn’t think straight to even care or even speak up to tell Trent you were cumming. He knew you well enough to know that’s what this was, in fact, he knew before you even had. He pressed the button once more to turn the massager back down to its original, lower, thank god, setting. Your chest heaved as you came down from your high, your clit still pulsating. 

“T, baby, please.” You whimpered as you pushed off of him, sitting up right. You were desperate for more. He just set you off. You turned around, placing your hands onto his shoulders swinging one of your legs over his lap and straddling him. Trent’s cock was painfully hard after watching you cum like that.  In quick succession, you pulled his length out from his joggers. You took his throbbing cock and ran the tip of it through your folds. 

“Go ‘head, pretty girl.” Trent smiled loving how needy you were for him. You nodded, taking his instructions, guiding his cock into your wet pussy’s entrance. Your eyes fluttered closed as you slowly began to slid down, taking every inch of him. “Fuck me, baby. Feel so good f’me.” He groaned feeling you around him.

“Oh my god.” You moaned. No matter how insane of an orgasm he just gave you with a massage gun, nothing would ever compare to how good he felt inside you. He dipped his head lower, kissing down your neck all the way to your exposed chest. He wrapped his lips around one of your already sensitive nipples. He groaned, biting your nipple, pulling on it with his teeth. You whined even more. You were gone. Trent had you a complete mess. He had your ass in his big hands. He slapped one of your asscheeks. The sound of his hand smacking against your skin and the squelch of you riding him was beyond lewd. The way you slid up and down on his cock was pure bliss for Trent. He didn’t want this to stop but the way your pussy clenched again and again had him dangerously close to cumming. His length was covered in your slick, it was a  pornographic sight. The veins in Trents neck pulled as he groaned trying to not finish just yet. He leaned your body back and thrusted up into you while you continued to bounce on top of him holding onto his shoulders. You made eye contact with him through hooded eyes as he fucked into you. Your nails dug into his skin, leaving behind crescent shapes, trying to hold off on your high till he told you you could cum. 

“Fucking hell, baby. Cum with me, yeah? Cum, baby. I need to cum inside you.” Trent growled, pulling you back into his embrace, nuzzling his face into the nape of your neck. He bit down into your skin. You whined his name repetitively as you came around him, falling apart, your pussy tightening and throbbing all at once. He groaned, releasing his warm cum inside you. Your body collapsed into his. You ran your hands over his hair delicately despite your heart still racing. 

“I love you so much, T.” You whispered, breathing the scent of him in. You laid into him limply as you both tried to regulate your heavy breathing.

“My baby.” He kissed your skin. “That felt so fucking good. God, I love you, beautiful.” He whispered, dragging you off him to cup your face in his hands. He looked deep into your eyes before he kissed you. You smiled into the kiss and pulled away with a giggle. You weren’t expecting your assistance post training to turn into all that. 

“C’mere, beautiful.” Trent pulled at your bare waist when he came home from training the following day. You were changing into a new outfit for a dinner you were going to tonight. He dragged your semi lingerie clad body back a little bit into him after he had come into your wardrobe. You were inspecting a romper you were holding up that you had thought you had wanted to wear but were now second guessing it. 

“I don’t want to be fat again.” You sighed sadly turning to him with a childish pout as you pulled the off the shoulder light pink romper over your body. 

“Baby, you have never been fat. If you’re talking about just changes because of the pregnancy… You’re carrying a baby, sweetheart. It’s so beautiful, really. You’re so beautiful.” He gripped your shoulders, turning you back to look at yourself in the mirror. He kissed your collarbone from behind leaning over you. “Look at you, gorgeous girl.” He slid his hands down your sides a few times before landing on your hips and squeezing them. 

“I look horrible. It’s just the worst part of the whole thing.” You sighed running your own hands over the front of the romper to flatten its material down to your stomach that was still flat but just the thought of what was to come was already upsetting you. It was far from true but you felt like you could see the bump already.

“You could never. What your body is doing is an amazing thing.” You rolled your eyes at Trent’s honest and sweet words that unfortunately weren’t enough to sway you. You scoffed a little at a kiss to the back of your shoulder and his sincere sentiment. “Well, you’re just in such a good mood today, huh?” He laughed. “Gimme a kiss, make you feel better.” He cooed, turning you around once more. 

“You’re hilarious.” You sighed defeatedly. He was amazing, you were just easily deflated by the idea of your appearance changing. A lot of women loved pregnancy and embraced the natural beauty of it all but you didn’t have a ton of that around you. You had your mum who immediately monitored your appearance from the second before to the second after you gave birth and all the way though, Lauren and Winnie who were actively avoiding pregnancy, walking around with arguably 10/10 bodies, and Dianne who would do anything to convince you that you were beautiful, but your put that off to you just being her daughter in law. It was a slightly confusing jumble of support. 

“Let’s think of all the fun things… c’mon.” Trent gently suggested kissing your forehead. 

“What? like not sleep…” You snapped unnecessarily harshly, turning away from him to go look for the shoes you wanted to wear with your outfit tonight.  You combed through shelves of shoes frustrated, unable to find the silver pair of Aquazzura heels you wanted. 

“Aw, baby don’t do this” Trent groaned trying his best not to get frustrated with you. You hadn’t even found out ‘officially’ about your pregnancy yet and this was how your mood was. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t thrilled by the possibility of nine months of this type of attitude. He just gave you a gentle smile trying not to deep it too much.  

“Well you’re not the one…” You began to start another snappy comment. “Nevermind, I’m sorry.” You exhaled with a sad smile seeing him sit down on an ottoman in the wardrobe patient as ever ready to listen. “Hi…” You pouted at him. “I missed you all day.” You sulked feeling sorry for being so short tempered with him after he was nothing but kind. You came and sat on his lap, draping your arms over his shoulders. You snuggled into him.

“There she is. Hi, baby.” He kissed your temple. “Missed you so so much. I missed you all day and I will next week, you know. So can you please come with me?” Trent segued into his quest to get you to go to Milan with him. You both had been invited to the Prada Spring/Summer Fashion Show. Since your British GQ article came out your status just socially really took off. You were getting invites, your following on Instagram skyrocketing even more, PR requests for more opportunities came flooding in. God bless him, Tyler was helping you out in the meantime but simultaneously trying to get you set up with an agency to work with because he and Trent didn’t really have the resources in the women’s fashion world that were relevant for who and what you were getting requests about. 

“No, I don’t think so, T.” You shyly and selfishly told him. You had decided to go, then not go, then go, and now were currently in a ‘not go’ phase. It was all very exciting initially, slightly overwhelming, sure, but since the whirlwind change of going from simply a mum to a pregnant woman with a 2 year old made you less interested in flying around for shows or frivolous trips down to London for dinners with brands. You were of course grateful and flattered you were invited but leaving Teddy and additionally getting dressed up, trying to look good when you felt anything but, like you’d already gained weight, when your self confidence was plummeting, when your skin felt less than, it was just too much. “Everyone is just going to say I gained weight.” You oversimplified your mind's tornado of thoughts, looking at him with a lot of fear behind your eyes.  

“You haven’t.” He confirmed. He actually completely disagreed. He thought you looked great, You looked gorgeous with a more healthy glow than usual, in fact. You visibly didn’t look all that different from a month or so ago till this moment. No real physical signs of pregnancy had really begun to show but maybe there had been a bit of a placebo effect happening in the mirror now that you knew..

“I have, I’ve been weighing my…” You started talking and then trailed off as Trent’s eyes grew wider with inquiry, a little shocked and frankly, annoyed to hear that you were doing something he really hoped you’d forgotten about entirely.

“Baby…” He cautioned you. He was fairly stern, hanging on to the things you’d promised you’d keep to for your health, for the health of his child’s mother, for the health of your relationship, really. He hated the idea of ‘tough love’ with you but he cared enough to do it. 

“T… I had to know.” You poorly defended your actions, falling back into unhealthy ways. You were using your fluctuating emotions as an excuse to swerve back into old habits that provided a bizarre form of solace for yourself. It gave you an uncomfortable feeling of comfort. It was a semblance of control you were able to create. You needed to know.  

“You don’t. Baby, you do not. Come on, we have to manage this better, Y/N. I’m not doing all that again. I’m so serious. I love you and it’s just not happening again.” Trent was very very serious. He was not messing about. Now that he knew what was at risk, what happened after Teddy was born, your essential collapse, not a shot in hell he was letting you two fall anywhere back near that place. “How can I help? How can I make you happy, just for today? We’ll deal with tomorrow, tomorrow. Let me help.” He asked you, insisting you let him in. He ran one of his hands up and down your back.

“Can I just have a kiss please.” You sighed and asked him with a childish pout. You knew Trent would baby you if you even gave him a sliver of space to do so. He was ready to give some sort of ‘tough love’ but the way you batted your lashes and your bottom lip rolled, had him crumbling almost every time. 

“Always. C’mere beautiful. C’mere.” He cooed, pulling you gently by the back of your neck with his big hand into a soft kiss. He hummed loving the feeling of your lips on him and you definitely didn’t disagree. 

“Will you be mad if we have another girl?” You asked a little nervously. You couldn’t control anything like the gender of your baby so asking for his opinion was a little bit of a doomed thing to do. That said, no matter what he’d say you weren’t sure you’d believe him either way. You knew he loved being a girl dad but a part of him and yourself of course wanted a little boy. 

“Nah, we just have to keep trying don’t we?” He teased trying to lighten the mood, pecking your lips once more with a cheeky smile. Your face didn’t change so he quickly kept talking. “I’m joking baby… absolutely not. Look how beautiful Ted is, how beautiful you are. I’d love another Alexander-Arnold girl in my life.” He told you honestly and you took a deep breath thankful. Even if he wasn’t being totally truthful you appreciated him saying that. You think he was being honest though. 

“What should I wear tonight?” Trent asked you a bit later on as you were finalizing your look for your dinner date with him with lip gloss in the en-suite of your bedroom. He evidently hadn’t gotten dressed yet despite your initial plan to leave the house in 10 minutes. 

“T…” you laughed. “Are you serious? I thought you were ready to go?” You asked him, staring back at him leaned against the door frame behind you still in his joggers through the mirror. He just winked back at you. “You’re lucky you’re pretty.” You teased.  

“Pretty and in need of my pretty girl’s help so...” He cooed, waiting for you to give him the assistance he was looking for. 

“The blue Rhude knit shirt I got you, please!” You called out as he had already turned to leave the en-suite to go into your wardrobe. He hummed as you layered a coat of the shiny gloss over your plump pink bottom lip. 

“Can I wear Dior pants? You know those ones…” He yelled his fairly vague question for you to hear. Despite his vagueness you knew what he meant. You smacked your glossy lips together with a smile. Trent had done a full 360 on his opinion on your help with his clothing. Yes, 360. He had initially let you help him, to try to get in your good graces because he had a crush on you, he wanted to show you he respected you. Then as you got more comfortable in your relationship, he tried to hold his ground. He could feel himself slipping, that he had no backbone when it came to you. Even if he knew that your suggestion was the better option, he’d stay with his choice just to prove a point. He was stubborn and you loved him for that. Now? Now, he wanted you to do it all the time. He preferred you to pick for him. 

“I like those if you want but I’d kind of prefer a navy pant. Can you do the blue Prada ones? I like them better with like the LV cream and white trainers.” You rattled on and Trent smiled listening to you as he combed through his things looking for what you were instructing him to wear. Minutes later as you were rushing to throw everything in your Pucci bag, he came out changed and somehow ready before you. 

“I did good, no?” He smiled big like a little kid proud of his look that you had put together as if he had done it all on his own.  

“Yeah, very good, baby.” You laughed and he hummed victoriously. “Going to give me any credit? You know people used to pay me to do this?” You told him with a smug face waiting for your kudos.

“You always know what looks best but is it the clothes or is it me though?” Trent cooed and you rolled your eyes at his cockiness. He came towards you and wrapped his arms around your waist. “How am I meant to afford you though? You're priceless, baby.” He kissed your hair. You gave him one more eye roll even though your heart was fluttering at the things he was saying to you. “Fine, fine, I’ll pay you for your services, hmm? Promise. Taking you out to dinner, who says I don’t have a little gift for my baby, and I absolutely promise when we get home... I’ll give you one of my best services in return, yeah?” He kept talking, letting his voice drop lower and closer to a whisper coming to press his lips to your ear. A shiver ran up your spine subsequently.  

“Yeah… okay. I’ll accept all that. Still might be a little short but… It’s fine.” You tried your hardest  to focus on keeping the fun game of banter going and not get distracted by his switch up. You moved out of his hold heading to the door out of your room to the hall to leave for dinner.   

“A little short! How!?” He yelped, chasing after you. He kept an offended face but he loved when you’d mess about with him.

“I gave you a child!” You snapped turning around to face him with a conniving grin. 

“I gave you a child! That was a shared endeavor!” He rebuttled his correction as he wrapped his arms around you frantically dragging you back into the room with him walking backwards. “Hey, hey, hey. We made that little girl together. If you want I’ll refresh your memory on how we did it, alright?” He spoke with a cheeky smile that had your heart racing.  

“Later. We have to go. I hate being late for reservations.” You pecked his lips, placing your hands on top of his and removing them from your body. You actually left the room this time successfully to get downstairs. 

“I knowww.” He groaned having to readjust himself in his pants after your heated conversation. 

“Can I start you off with some cocktails?” The waitress asked you. You were sat at a small table across from him in a dimly lit restaurant. The same type of lighting that he had looked so gorgeous in on your first date. The one that had you practically stuttering and hiding behind your hands or your cocktail. You felt the same unfairness looking at him. Even years later, he was stunning.  

“Erm.. yeah... Oh no, wait actually, I’m okay, thank you though.” You stumbled through your answer momentarily, almost forgetting you were pregnant and couldn’t order the margarita you usually liked to order at this restaurant. Trent smiled, reaching out to brush his finger over your knuckles pretty happy for the reason you weren’t not drinking. 

“And for you?” The waitress raised her eyebrow, practically licking her lips at Trent. She had this tone in the way she asked him that insinuated you were boring for not drinking. You wanted to stand up and tell her you were not drinking because the man, also your husband, she was currently undressing with her eyes fucked a baby into you but you would never, you certainly thought about though. 

“No, we’re alright. Just two waters…” He paused. “Lemon?” Trent looked to you for confirmation so you nodded. “Yeah. Lemon, please. Thank you.” He sweetly nodded to her, flicking his gaze back to you. 

“Ridiculous.” You teased him as the waitress left your table. You rolled your eyes at the situation.  

“What?” He looked at you fairly confused and very naively because the look on your face was one of sincerity and familiarity he didn’t recognize why.

“Just the influx of women all day. How do you even know you want me when you have so many options?” You asked. It came out so bitter and insensitive. You didn’t mean to come off so harsh, it's just that it was a matter of fact, women came up to him all the time.

“Wow… erm.” Trent kind of choked getting out a response. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

“T, I…” You tried to explain through a stutter but he cut you off before you could even get out that you didn’t mean it as a jab. 

“Nah, nah. I’m gonna answer because you clearly want to know.” He smiled at you with a confidence that made you feel a little insecure. You felt guilty it came out that way. You weren’t trying to be critical of him. You’d be lying if you said the attention from women didn’t bother you a little bit it wasn’t his fault. He never fed into it. “I know, baby, because you are the only woman I see. Don’t roll your eyes yet, alright?  Let me explain this. You are illuminated and they all are just dulled out in my vision. I barely even see them. They don’t have the same light behind their eyes. Their laughs don’t sound right. They don’t make my heart hurt when they leave. I can feel it when you're close by and they don’t feel right, their energy isn’t right for me. You're everything they don’t even know they aren’t. Everything you are is everything I’ve ever wanted.” He told you with certainty keeping his eyes locked on yours. 

“Oh…” you sheepishly got out wanting to hide embarrassed but you kept your eyes fixed on him, feeling a bit more comfortable and braver than your first date. You didn’t want to look anywhere but those perfect brown eyes. 

“I get an ‘oh’ in response?” He laughed a little at your shyness teasingly. You had more on your mind but that was the only word that would come out. 

“No I just…” You didn’t know what to say or how to articulate it maybe. You felt flustered like you were just meeting all over again. You looked at him with doe eyes feeling insecure despite the massive rock on your finger telling you to feel otherwise. 

“Baby, I don’t think you’ll ever understand what you do to me. Wrapped me around these dainty little fingers.” Trent smiled, pulling on your ring finger clearly on the same page as you. “It’s unfair what you do to me and I love every second of the inconsideration you unknowingly took on my heart.” He continued. 

“I don’t know if I agree that I have that effect but I know that I feel that way about you.” You shyly said to him with a cheeky smile though. Trent shook his head disagreeing with your disagreement. “It’s strange, no? To feel so out of control about the way you feel for someone.” Your smile grew and you felt like so did the size of your heart. 

“Yeah, like there’s nothing I can do. You got me, baby. No getting rid of me now because you’re all I want and I’m never living without you.” Trent gave you a smirk that made butterflies swarm your stomach. 

“No, nothing at all.” You giggled. “Just completely at yours, pretty boy.” You smiled at him and Trent felt his heart falter just the same as he watched the warm candle light flicker across your face. “But that’s good you feel that way because I’m not leaving you so you’re stuck with me… well us too.” You smiled again, placing your hand on your stomach referring to you, your daughter Teddy, and your unborn little baby. 

“I love you, beautiful… all of you.”  Trent cooed, keeping his eyes on you in the soft lighting. You were full and you haven't even eaten yet. You were full from the way he made your heart feel.

“More than you can imagine, T.” You responded with tears pushing their way to your lash line. You weren’t even sure if this merited the amount of emotion you felt but regardless you were feeling it. Maybe it was pregnancy or maybe it was him. 

“Got you a little something.” Trent handed you a sizable familiar orange box across your table. He could have waited till you got home but Trent loved doing this. He wanted you to feel special. It made you feel special. You opened the box cautiously. A blue Hermes blanket embroidered again with ‘Baby Alexander-Arnold’ on it.

“Oh…” You whimpered out. Maybe this did warrant the tears that were now about to spill over your lash line.

“You and Ted like the one we got for her, you know and I want this baby and mummy to be happy and cozy together as well the same way. I also thought it was special last time. We could get one for every kid and I just… Do you like it?” He asked you a bit shyer than you were expecting considering how much you did love it. 

“T, it's perfect.” You officially started crying. You were quiet but clearly a bit overtaken by the emotion and how sweet Trent was, not just tonight but all the time, every day. 

“Wow, that's so chic.” The waitress came back to the table to check on you interrupting an intimate moment. This was the first thing for your new baby. 

“Sorry, do you mind if we have a moment?” Trent snapped fairly quickly to her. It was still polite but he kept his eyes locked on yours. You smiled considerately. Your favorite moment in the world, selfishly, was when Trent put you above anyone. It wasn’t about anyone else right now but you two. 

You changed when you got home, tired of being in your heels. You sat cuddled up to Trent back in the cinema kissing on his soft skin as he watched a NBA game on the big screen, it’s blue light filling the dark room. You had no idea who was even playing in the game. Your face was buried in the nape of his neck until a thought popped into your head. 

“What’s your favorite way to kiss me?” You smiled into another kiss against him with a hum. 

“What a question. I’m pretty happy with what you’re doing right now but the way I kiss you? I don’t know, baby. Just when it’s soft, slow. I get to hold you nice and tight to me. Even though it’s gentle, when it's still heated and I know this sounds stupid but I can feel that you love me. Those are the ones for me.” He explained his answer to you in probably a more thoughtful way than you were expecting. Although, that seemed to be the theme of the night. You hummed and wrapped your arms around him a little tighter, giving him a squeeze before moving one of your hands up under his t-shirt continuing on with your task of kissing his neck simultaneously now rubbing your hand over his abs. “I really do like the ones though when I’m inside you and we're having a kiss and you moan into me. Oof baby, I don’t know… that gets me going. Biting on my lip a little as well. That’s up there for sure.” He smiled, dropping his gaze towards you. 

“T, baby…” you whined a little nibbling up his neck, littering his skin with kisses coming up to his jawline, moving towards his lips. 

“I love when you call me that.” He whispered to you moving your face off from him so he could turn his and look directly at you. He kept your cheek cupped in the palm of his hand. 

“Yeah?” You asked in a slightly childish tone but it was also laced with seduction. You kissed the inside of his wrist.

“Yeah. I like ‘T,’ I like ‘baby,’ I mean ‘dada’ always makes me smile.” Trent filled you in on his preferred names that you’d call him.  

“Daddy?” You teased him.  

“Yeah I mean fine, in the context of Ted but that’s more jokes between you and me.” He laughed trying to play it off like you hadn’t seen lust wash over him in the times you’d called him that in private. 

“Is it? Because I think it turns you on.” You giggled with a cheeky smile giving him a bit of a tease. 

“I think it turns you on!” He yelped defending himself, turning your accusation back on you with an equally if not more cheeky smile. 

“Depends on the context, you just turn me on.” You repeated his initial commentary. He hummed in agreement, pecking your lips. 

“Nah, but I do like when I get you to fall into this voice. It’s just for me. You slow. It’s breathy like you’re begging for something but it’s sweet and playful. Baby, I’m telling you now, you just got me down. Everytime you know exactly what I want to hear and how I want to hear it.” He cooed with a glint in eyes as his thumb gently caressed your cheek. 

“T, baby.” You cooed in just the tone of voice he was talking about unintentionally. It was soft and sexy, sincere and innocent. 

“That’s it, that's the one. Gets me every fucking time. That name. Only one in my life that’s ever called me that. And that tone is… just god.” He trailed off getting lost in the thought of you. 

“Oh, you like that? Like when I’m in your ear whining your name T, baby.” Your purposefully pushed yourself into him a little more saying it again. Your hands dropped towards the waist of his joggers. You teased him, dragging your nails over his abs.

“We’re going upstairs.” He quickly told you, disregarding his plan to watch this basketball game. He scooped you up like he did your 25 pound daughter, throwing you over his shoulder. You giggled excited for the rest of your night. He smiled as he jogged up the stairs holding you. 

“It’s so good to see you again!” A nurse came into the room you were seated anxiously in. You weren’t sure if she actually recognized you or if she simply just remembered the last name and Trent’s memorable but also famous face. You definitely remembered her though. She was sweet and super helpful through your entire pregnancy with Teddy. 

“Yeah, course. We’re excited to be here.” Trent eagerly responded, squeezing your hand in his. He was beaming. You were trying to be a bit more tame. You were nervous and not in the way he was. Trent was nervous, of course, but more about like your actual health than your capability to be a parent. He knew you both would be great. You were a bit more apprehensive about the concept of having two kids. You went through the formalities of the appointment. Second by second it ticked by and you just had a feeling as the transducer glided over your stomach with the cold gel that you knew the gender. You could feel it. You had a hunch but you didn’t share it with Trent ahead of the appointment. As the images filled the screen, you could hear your baby's heartbeat. The emotions became overwhelming. You thought you’d be prepared for this having done it once before. You were not.  

“I'm here, baby.” Trent whispered to you. Tears started to roll down your cheeks as you laid staring back at Trent. He wiped his thumb under your eye catching them like he always did. He kissed your temple softly. 

“So you’re coming in a little later this time I think. You’re already about 10 weeks along. It’s good you’re here though.” The nurse spoke gently, looking between you and Trent. Your eyes widened a bit, taken aback. 

“I’ve been pregnant for like… months…” You muttered back shocked. “I wasn’t like taking care of… I didn’t know.”  You were trying to reflect back and think about what was going on two months ago. You were panicking thinking about if you had somehow messed something up already with this pregnancy. The nurse kept speaking to you about how essentially you were fine. You weren’t able to focus though you were combing through the events of the last couple week but Trent was. Two months ago it was early November and Winnie had visited. That made you fairly nervous. You were trying to remember everything you did with her. Trent had a memory like an elephant though so he had the same thought but immediately felt at ease recalling that you asked him if he felt a little sick that night. You did so you opted not to drink. It didn’t even occur to you that just by your own body’s instinct you had been doing everything just fine.

“Well, congratulations Alexander-Arnold’s, looks like you’re going to have one of each. You’re going to have a baby boy!” The nurse cooed sweetly. You had blacked out everything but the sound of your baby’s heartbeat until you heard her say that.

“Nah, nah, nah. No way.” Trent was shocked. He had mentally prepared himself to hear he was going to have another girl. The tears that slowly leaked from the corner of your eyes just began to flood as you sat up a little. The disbelief in Trent’s face made you giggle. His head snapped from the nurse to you. “Holy shit, baby.” He exhaled with a bewildered expression. His eyes watered. He cupped your face and pressed his nose against yours letting his eyes flutter closed. 

“Going to have a little boy.” You pouted before pressing a kiss to his lips. “That okay, T?” You asked him even though you knew this was his dream.

“I… I … I don’t know what to say. Oh my god.” Trent ran his hands over his face trying to process wha he just heard. He puffed out a heavy breath. “I’ve never been happier in my life. I mean.. fuck.” He slapped his hand over his mouth. “Sorry.” He apologized to the nurse after he kept cursing but she waved him off. “I mean it's the same type of happiness but it’s so different then when we found out about Ted. Holy fuck. I can’t believe I get to have a son with you.” He shook his head and started to cry. Anytime Trent cried you knew it was seriously important to him.

“Yeah, our little son. Baby boy Alexander-Arnold. I hope he’s just like you, T.”  You pulled Trent down to squeeze him in a tight embrace. He held onto you while the doctor printed out the photos of the scan for you. 

“I love you. I love you more than anything in the entire world. Thank you so much for carrying our little boy. I can’t wait for our family to grow. I’m so excited. I can’t believe we’re going to have a boy. Thank you, thank you.” Trent babbled just in complete and utter shock. 

“Going to be another fall baby, I guess. Have to ask Winn about his astrology.” You cooed and Trent rolled his eyes. You laughed, kissing his cheek. Trent wasn’t exactly sold on the whole thing but Winnie was. It was something she lived her life by. You just wanted him to understand this baby would arrive in the fall. He was so taken aback that you were having a boy you weren't sure he’d put the math of the timeline together yet. He didn’t care when this baby arrived though. He was over the moon. The nurse handed you the photos of the scan of your baby. You held them inspecting your growing baby boy for the first time. Trent placed his hand on your stomach gently and hid his face in your neck a little overcome with emotion till. Having a son was unreal to him. It was something he had dreamed of. You knew he would never put pressure on your little boy but the idea he could potentially have a son who played football was everything he ever wanted. This was unbelievable that he’d even have the opportunity to even play footie in the back garden with his son. He, of course, would treat him and Teddy just the same but there was something special about having a son. The same way you felt something special about having a daughter. “I love you so much, T. You’re going to be the best daddy to him. I’m so happy, baby.” You hummed, finally feeling the excitement of this pregnancy seeing his reaction as you kissed his temple, holding him. 

“I wonder what Teddy will think.” He pulled away from you with wet eyes and a smile. You smiled back and started to deep it. God, you hoped she’d be excited as you two were right now. 

“You know that’ll be tough.” Trent cooed while driving as you sat in the passenger seat.  

“What do you mean?” You asked him curiously with a smirk knowing it was going to be something close to ludacris. 

“I mean he’s gotta live up to me? Tough no?” Trent explained, keeping his eyes fixed on the road.   

“Stop.” You scoffed at him. You knew he was joking but also it did actually cross your mind when you heard what your little boy's life might end up like having to constantly be compared to Trent. You had already been pondering what to name him because originally you loved the idea of all your kids having ‘TAA’ initials but you also were worried about the ramifications or burden it might be to carry that name. It was different for Teddy. It felt like she had the protection of the surname where it felt like with a boy, your little boy, the surname might act more as a target against him. 

“Nah, I’m being forreal though, I don’t want his mates teasing him for having a leng mum picking him up.” Trent kept a straight face. You had been worried about what it was like to have Trent as a dad whereas, even though he was joking about, he’d definitely clocked a worry he’d been harboring about how people looked at you. Not derogatorily about you at all. He wanted to protect you. He just knew how sensitive you were and how shitty people could be. He knew how you felt when people said things now like the ever circulating ‘with him for his money comment’ or ‘trapped him with babies’ narrative. He didn’t want anything like those types of things to affect your ability to be a mum and be present with them. 

“Well, I mean you don’t think that will happen with Teddy’s guy friends?” You asked him with a cheeky smirk of your own. 

“She’s not having guy friends. I don’t know what you’re on about.” Trent seriously responded and fast to your remark. 

“Oh shush.” You swatted at him. It was a stupid comment but you also knew he kind of meant it. 

“Nah never. Staying home with me every night. Ted doesn’t know boys exist.” He snapped with a bit of a laugh. Trent wanted Teddy to be his baby girl forever and that was becoming more and more apparent. 

“Except she does. She’s surrounded by you lot all the time.” You informed him. Teddy was around boys and you 24/7. Between Trent, Marcel, Tyler, George, Jude, the list rattled on.

“That’s different. Boys are mad these days. I’m her dad and their uncles. Boys her age. Nah, absolutely not.  I’m talking when she’s like older, boys in her school year, absolutely not. They can’t be near her and they can’t look at her… or you. I couldn’t have seen what you look like now in bed when I was 13 or 14. I wouldn’t have been able to handle it, ya know?” Trent breathily laughed.  “Would’ve just wanked all day. Fucking hell.” He laughed a little more imagining his younger self seeing the images he got to see day in and day out in your bedroom. Frankly, even out of the bedroom. 

“Ew, first, gross.” You giggled along with him thinking it was equally as funny. You rubbed your hand tenderly on his thigh. “Secondly, no one else is seeing what you’re seeing. Also, what I don’t have that effect on you now? Grown Trent isn’t as easily swayed?” You teased, questioning him sliding your hand higher up and higher up his leg. 

“Nah, relax. I’m telling you now baby… it’s fucking work.” He sighed, shaking his head. “I’m fighting for my life out here, every day.” He groaned as you palmed over his hardening cock as he tried to focus on the task of driving, proving his point. You giggled moving your hand off him with a smug smile pretty content with yourself. 

When Trent came home from another day after training. You were sitting on the couch minding your own waiting for him to get home. You were tired and catching up on an episode from a show you were watching on Netflix. You heard Trent come in through the garage door but you were too lazy to get up. He snuck in dropping his stuff and dragged his equally tired body on top of yours. He laid his entire weight on top of you. He just started kissing your skin all over, anywhere he could without a word.

“Hi.” You giggled wrapping your arms around his strong body rubbing your hands up and down his back covered by a jumper as he continued on his quest to kiss every inch of you. “That made me smile, T.” You told him. When Trent needed you, when he was soft with you, he didn’t ask for cuddles, he just took them and that was one of your favorite Trents.   

“Do anything to make you smile.” He mumbled with his face staying buried in the nape of your neck.

“I love you, T. That made me really happy.” You gave him a cheesy smile as he pulled away to hold your face, stroking your cheek with his thumb. 

“I love you, baby. Couldn’t wait to get back home to you.” He hummed kissing your nose.  

“Did you see daddy’s home, Teddy girl?” You cooed a little louder for Teddy who was presumably still somewhere close by playing with the dogs. She heard you and came running and fast. 

“Yeah daddy just got home and I am still waiting for my hello from my baby bear. How come you weren’t at the door?” Trent asked Teddy as she rounded the couch, giving her a tired but equally cheeky smile. 

“I’m sorries I… I… was with doggies.” Teddy babbled out feeling guilty. She usually met Trent at the door. She liked to but she had gotten distracted today and your own laziness hearing him come in didn’t help. 

“Ted, beautiful, I’m kidding. Come here. Did you give mummy a kiss today?” He called her over and reached out to her. He picked her up under her little arms and lifted her up onto the couch. He had moved off you and pulled her into his lap. He kissed her cheek. You smiled seeing them back together and laid your head onto his chest to listen to their conversation. She nodded that she had and she did. “How many?” He asked her one more question.

“Don’t knows, dada.”  She looked up at him with doe eyes with guilt washing over her again. She felt so bad she couldn’t remember. 

“That’s not enough then is it?” Trent cooed with a gentle smile. He cupped her cheek. She smiled back at him with a little giggle sensing his teasing tone. Trent nodded towards you  encouraging her to go on. 

“Mama here go.” Teddy cutely gave you a kiss. You laughed back at her with a thank you.

“Just one? You’re only going to give mummy one more!” Trent yelped, plopping her onto her feet. He stood up and began to chase Teddy around the couch. She squealed excitedly that he was home to play with her. You didn’t really have that vitality about you lately.  They both seemed to have endless energy, you didn’t feel that way. To be fair, one was under three and the other was a professional athlete. You couldn’t keep up… you were a pregnant woman.  You sighed though loving their laughs imagining what life would be like once your new addition arrived. You turned around and laid your arms onto the back of the couch. You rested your chin on top of them watching the cute chaos ahead of dinner ensue. 

“Teddy girl, can you come here please?” You cooed while taking a seat on the couch in your living room. She was laying on the carpet playing with a few toys.  She picked her head up and nodded. You were entering the middle of your second trimester, just starting the month of May. You had an appointment with your doctor yesterday and decided with Trent that it was a good time to finally tell Teddy. You had decided that you’d tell your families in the middle of the month so you figured or at least you hoped your two and half year old could keep a secret for you till then, it was roughly 14 days, you thought she could. Trent had just come home. He was grabbing both you and him a drink before he came to sit with you to break the news Teddy wasn’t going to be an only child for much longer. 

“Dada!” Teddy giggled, getting slightly distracted by his appearance in the room. She ran up to him and clung to Trent’s leg. He let her hold on while he dragged her with him to sit next to you.  

“Yeah, yeah, yeah I’m here, hi, but come on. Mummy and I have to tell you something.”  Trent laughed at her overzealousness. 

“Tay. Is it a secret?” She asked inquisitively. Letting go of Trent and pulling herself up onto the couch using his body like a jungle gym and crawling into his lap. She sillily laid out flat letting her head gently fall into your lap. It was strange but sweet that it was like she somehow subconsciously knew she couldn't be as rough with you anymore so she funneled all her energy into the way she’d grab at Trent.  

“Yeah, my Teddy bear. It’s between you, daddy, and I, okay?” You explained starting to feel more emotional now seeing her looking like a real toddler in your lap. It was sort of sad she wasn’t your little baby any more. That she’d be your ‘oldest’ now. 

“Tay tell! Dada tell!” She just about yelled pulling on your shirt sitting herself up. She wiggled her body to sit on Trent’s leg closet to you and draped herself around your neck in a hug. 

“Okay, but it’s a secret, got it? You have to pinky promise, okay?” Trent smiled at her. She nodded and let go of you sticking her pinky out to him, something Trent had recently taught her to do. It was over ridiculous things and she often broke them to tell you about her promises with daddy or tell Trent about her promises with mummy. You hoped that the sacred binds of the pinky promise really stuck better this time. “ Good. Thanks, Ted. So mummy and daddy are really excited right now because there’s a baby growing in mummy’s tummy.” Trent just laid it out in the open brining his hand to gently rub over your stomach for her to understand. Your breath hitched a little. You had discussed this. This was the plan but you just weren’t ready to hear it or something. Trent had no fear. He definitely lived by the ‘just rip it off’ method.  

“You’re going to have a little brother after summer time.” You explained to her the facts a little further, running your hand over her head. You gave her a sympathetic smile, praying she wasn’t going to be upset. 

“Um…” Teddy hummed looking between you and Trent momentarily. “Whys?” She asked you two earnestly. It was better than maybe a ‘no’ you tried to tell yourself.  

“What do you think, baby?” Trent asked her. You had consulted your doctor about best practices for telling a toddler and she had advised that letting them think about it would often help you navigate the conversation so you answered the questions they had. 

“Don’t knows, dada.” She replied with a sad pout. Her face dropped. You could read her expression. It was as if she felt bad she didn’t know the answer, like it was something she should have known so you were quick to help her and reassure her it was fine. 

“That’s okay, baby. We want there to be another member of our family because we love each other so much.” You emphasized the word so kissing her forehead. “Mummy and daddy made a baby and he’ll grow in my tummy till the end of summer then he’ll come out when he’s ready.” You explained a little more sheepishly than you would’ve liked. You laid your hand over your growing round belly for her to see. You hoped this was all making sense. 

“Replacing me?” Teddy’s voice quivered as she asked you with a frown. Her eyes falling into the pools that would always break your heart.  

“No, no, no, baby!  Just making you a best friend, okay?” You cooed fast, immediately making sure she understood that was definitely not the point of this. You wrapped her in your arms, pulling her into a cuddle. You ran your hand up and down her back gently. 

“No, baby bear. We love you so much.” Trent reassured her, kissing her sad pout. “Did you know that Celly is daddy’s little brother? So you’ll have your own ‘Celly.’ Isn’t that cool?” Trent further explained the concept a little more. Teddy adored Marcel so making it out like she was getting something she really liked of her own hopefully would work as an enticement.  

“Tay, like Celly.” Teddy nodded but kept a fairly stoic face. You could tell she was still processing but at least the tears that had welled were gone. She had the cutest expression of thought on her face. “What’s my celly doing in theres?” She asked, turning to you. Trent smiled victoriously, liking that his idea of broaching the baby as the concept of her getting a Marcel of her own had worked. 

“Oh... erm, well your baby brother is just growing bigger and bigger until he’s ready to come out.” You cooed rubbing her little arms. “Do you think he's sleeping now or awake?”  You asked. 

“I think he’s awake.” Trent interjected with his own opinion with a smile letting Teddy know this was a happy, fun thing they could talk about. 

“Umm…” Teddy thought for a moment. “Think sleeps cause mama comfy.” She explained cuddling into you. You hummed pulling her into you more. 

“Yeah, you’re right, Ted. Mummy is comfy, I think maybe he is then.” Trent cooed and Teddy nodded. “Is there anything else you want to know about your brother?” Trent asked her, rubbing his thumb over her chubby cheek.

“No, tank you.” Teddy cooed still ardently hugging you. Trent hummed accepting her answer but very aware that the following days, weeks, and months were going to be chock full of questions from her. “Mama…dada. Still love me with nother baby?”

“More than you can ever imagine, I promise. You have to promise me though that you’ll always be my baby bear, okay?” Trent pressed his nose to her with a silly smile. She giggled with another nod. 

“Yeah. Mummy and daddy’s little Teddy bear forever. Baby, I will love you just the same. Maybe even more, okay beautiful? Going to be a good big sister for me?” You asked Teddy and she gave you a sweet ‘tay.’ 

“Mama?” She looked up at you. You smiled at her and hummed a ‘mmhm.’ “Be big sissy like mama with WinWin?” She asked you and your heart just about shattered. Obviously Trent’s explanation of having a sibling relating it to his relationship with Marcel stuck. She’d been thinking about it more and more since he mentioned it. You tried to hum an answer but couldn’t contain your tears. You sniffled unable to talk. 

“Yeah, baby. You can be just like mummy and be the best big sister like her, okay? Do you want to be like mama?” Trent was quick to act, pulling both you and Teddy into him. He kissed your temple.

“Yeah huh, be like mama. Mama best.” Teddy cooed and you just kept crying. She didn’t know why but Trent got it. It was half that you were emotional about your daughter wanting to be like you and thinking highly of you and half that you were just pregnant and emotional.

•

Thank you for reading! Please like, comment, or message what you think of the chapter 🤍 We're coming to the end. Going to post Chapter 30 and then probably an Epilogue.

Next part - The Final Part | Chapter 30 xx

[rosaleelovesdilfs]

“Mama I’m In love with a Criminal” pt 1/?

MDNI, smut, kidnapping, mild Stockholm syndrome, mentions of ex mental abuse, daddy issues CLEARLY (lol) , mentions of murder and gore, and stalking. (If I forgot something I’m sorry!)

“Cooper what the FUCK!” You say as you’re leaned over, sweating digging a grave. What am I doing?

“Just keep digging.” He looks over at you, butchering the body. You gag, it’s so gruesome to watch his process. You know his process very well, but helping? Why the FUCK are you helping?!

Oh, yea…you’re in love with a fucking criminal, The Butcher.

Then:

“Welcome in! How can I help you?” You say putting on the most artificial smile.

“Vanilla cold brew, no ice, extra cream, two pumps of caramel, and foam on top.”

You have gotten used to no “thank yous” or “please”. Just put on a smile and do what they say.

“Yes Ma’am will that be all?” You ask in the most polite tone.

“Well did I say anything else? Yea that’s all.” She states.

“Apologize to her, she’s just doing her job…” a tall man in a firefighter uniform says. The lady looks at him and immediately flushes. “Oh uh yes sir. My apologies Cooper. I’m sorry” she says curtly to you.

Of course, Cooper Adams. I mean who didn’t know him? He’s the chief firefighter, polite, tall, and very fucking hot. “Hi Mr. Adams what can I do for you?” This time, without an artificial smile.

“Oh please, call me Cooper. I’ll just do a straight black coffee. Thank you sweetheart.”

Sweetheart…fuck is he dreamy. You hand him his coffee and his receipt to sign. When he hands it back, it has a number on it.

“I’m uh-hosting a thing at the station. Maybe if you could somehow cater? Call me.” He smiles as he turns around and walks out. That smile…it’s so perfect, too perfect.

Now:

After you’ve finished digging the grave you look over at Cooper. “What’s um-what’s next?”

“I need you to help me carry these pieces and put them in the hole. Got it?” He says walking over. “I’m sorry that you are having to do this…” he kisses you on the head. He’s not fucking sorry. He enjoys you helping. Enjoys having someone see the true him, The Butcher he’s always been. He loves having you get your hands dirty, and after this? After this he’ll join you in the shower and fuck you senseless. Fuck all the anger, emotion, and stress out.

You nod to him, doing as he says. You don’t really want to find out what would happen if you said no. Does he love you? Are you just a toy to him? Let’s be honest you don’t care. You’re in love with him, his flaws, his perfections, everything.

“Okay put these on.” He hands you a pair of gloves. You put them on as you help him carry the pieces of the body to the grave you dug. After all the pieces are in there, he starts to fill it back up. He’s done this countless times, always leaving a little piece of the victim somewhere for the police to find. He loves this little game, knowing people fear him, have nightmares about him. While people are having nightmares about him, what he may do, you’re inside his bed straddling him. Kissing him, riding his cock while he praises you.

“Good girl. You did so good tonight helping me.”

Then:

You dial the number left on the receipt.

“Hello?” His voice comes on the other end. His voice is like liquid sex, so smooth, so perfect. Too perfect.

“Hey! It’s y/n from the coffee shop. You mentioned something about catering…? You do know we don’t have much food correct?” You slightly giggle.

“Would you be mad if I said that was a lie just to get a pretty girls number?”

You fluster and get agitated just at that comment. “Oh really? And if I said I was mad?”

“Then I guess that would be an issue.” You hear him smile on the other end. “So now that I have your number, would you wanna go out sometime? Go anywhere you want.”

How could you say no? You’re not gonna say no to the chief firefighter that’s single and fucking hot. “Yea sure. Hey listen, there’s a rock concert actually in a week and my friend bailed…would you maybe wanna go? I don’t know what music you like but-“

“Yes of course I’ll go.” He cuts you off.

“Perfect it’s next Wednesday. Pick me up at 8:00.” You try not to scream with excitement.

“Okay see you then sweetheart.” He hangs up.

Concert day…

“You ever been to a concert before?” I ask. He gets sweaty and uneasy.

“Oh yea once. It was a long time ago though back when I lived in Philly.” He says looking around.

“Oh cool, that’s cool. I’ve been to a few but this is my first rock one.” You look up at him, still looking around paranoid. “You okay…?”

“Oh yea, just a lot of people.” He wipes his hands on his jeans and smiles down at you. “I’m having fun though, I promise.”

The concert ends an hour later and you get back to your place. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t want him to grab you and kiss you. You wanted him to kiss you like a starving man in all honesty.

“I had fun, thank you for coming with me.”

���Of course, I had fun too.” He pushes a piece of your hair behind your ear. You look up at him almost begging for him with your eyes. He can read your expression and leans in to kiss you. This was what you dreamed of, what you saw in the movies and the books you read.

You unlock the door to your house with him still on your lips.

“Fuck cooper.” You moan into him. He starts shedding his clothes, folding them neatly as he did so. You do the same with yours. You don’t know why he’s so neat with them, but did it matter? Before you know you’re on the couch with him between your legs, licking and sucking at your pussy. You grasp the couch and moan. This was heaven. This man’s lips, tongue, hair, everything was so perfect. For a moment your gut tells you something’s not right, but why listen when there’s a deeper knot building. His thick fingers teasing your entrance, pushing but not yet.

“Cooper…cooper fuck I’m close!” You grab his hair and tug which pulls a moan out of him.

“Good girl, take my tongue like the good girl you are.” He says looking up and returning to suck your clit.

His words hit you like a bus, your orgasm closely following. He continues until you’re squirming in his hands, the way he likes it. He likes when you struggle…

Who knew this would lead to you being his accomplice? Who knew he had this all planned out from the beginning?

“Turn around. Hands on the table.” He wasn’t asking, he was commanding. You have never done this on the first date, so why now?

“Yes sir.” You looked back at him smiling. The smile was hiding how nervous you were to take him all in. He smacks your ass leaving a stingful mark. He massages it with his hand after while massaging your clit. Next thing you know he pounds into you without warning, letting out a moan. “Fuck you feel so good baby. You’re gonna be good and take me all…”

You pant and let out almost incoherent moans and words as he relentlessly pounds into you, all while massaging your clit. “Come on baby you’re squeezing me, let go, come all over my cock.” Not long after you reach your climax, he follows right behind.

He cleans you up and kisses all the marks he left, praising and apologizing all at once. “You did so good for me.”

You fall asleep like that, in his arms. It was comforting but something was just nagging at you.

The next morning you both decide to go get breakfast at a new place up the street.

“So Cooper, how long have you lived here?” You ask curious.

“About four years now. Left Philly awhile back.” He almost looks around, trying to avoid your eyes as he says this.

“How come you left?”

“Hey I have to get going the station is calling me. Emergency. I’ll call you later okay?” He rushes to get up and kisses you on the forehead before he’s out the door. What the fuck was that about?

Now:

You quickly help him clean up the rest of the evidence at one of the safe houses he has. “Cooper, exactly how many people have you killed…?” You didn’t know if this was the first time, or the 10th time.

“This is my 13th victim. The other twelve were back in Philadelphia. My um- my family I’m not sure where they are. They are under witness protection. That’s why I chose this small town, no one would know who I am? I could tell you always thought something was off, something was not right, but yet here we are.” He starts to walk over to you. “I knew something in you could do it, you could be a good girl and help me.” He kisses me and touches me with his bloody hand. That wont last long. He has clinical OCD which means he can only be like this for about five minutes. Everything’s always constructed and achieved perfect. Too perfect.

All you can do is nod. Your brain and gut is telling you to turn away, go to the police as fast as you can. Your heart…it’s telling you to stay. To protect Cooper. You are officially an accomplice to this. You couldn’t run if you wanted to…this is what he wanted all along. For you to fucking HELP so you were stuck with him?! What the fuck did you get yourself into.

Im not quite sure how many parts I am going to do. I am going to aim for 3 though!! I hope y’all enjoy the first part :)!!! The second part will be out Sunday most likely!

@coopers-bunny @babygorewhore @cryobabyy @thebutchersbitch @hereforthehitsbaby @amethystblackkchaos @rainingrabbits89-blog @lustskitty69

If I forgot anyone I’m so sorry please just remind me in the comments!

[catholic-character-tournament]

Round 5 - Catholic Character Tournament

Propaganda below ⬇️

Pope Pinion IV (Cars)

HELLO. IT IS I. THE GREAT AND ALMIGHTY ITALIAN TOURNEY. PLEASEPLEASE PUT HIM IN THERE WAS SO MUCH POPE DISCOURSE ON MY ACC AND HE WAS SOLOED IN THE FIRST ROUND BY LUIGI😭😭😭💔💔💔💔💔💔💔💔 PLEASE AVENGE HIMMMM

The existence of Catholicism in the Cars universe implies that there was (or at least there was believed to be) a car Jesus who died for the cars’ sins, and I for one would like to see how a car gets crucified or sins. I guess the blood/wine here would be gasoline, but what would the body/bread be? How did they sit at the last supper? What is the layout of car church? How does a car build a church? Do other human religions exist in the cars universe? How does a goddess with the body of a human and the head of a cat translate to a car? Do Buddhist cars rein-car-nate? Do cars have souls?

he lost the italian character tournament, he will win here

Harrowhark

I'm pretty sure you've already got plenty of submissions for her so I'll just say she was raised in what is basically a cult (technically a nunnery but let's be real) dedicated to keeping the body of the thing that will kill God behind the rock. One of their prayers is actually "I pray the rock is never rolled away". Harrow is extremely devout as penance for her earlier heretical actions in the tomb as a child (spoiler!) so the Catholic guilt really comes through

imagine being a catholic nun and you meet god, but it turns out he’s a twitch streamer from new zealand who became god because everything got a little bit out of hand. and just before you met him you gave yourself a diy grief-fuelled lobotomy with the help of your best frenemy. imagine how insane you’d be. now multiply that insanity by nine. that’s the fictional love of my life right there.

she meets god. she’s not inspired

she’s number one practitioner of space Catholicism. The locked tomb is chock full of Christian (catholic) imagery themes metaphors etc. just look at her she’s got a bone rosary

They're Catholicism with extra bones. Everyone is a nun. They have what is basically a rosary made from knuckle bones. They technically worship the same God as everyone else, but they're waaaay more focused on The Body in the Tomb (Mary) and we get a moment where we find out that while everyone else prays the equivilent of The Lords Prayer, they're doing the equivilent of Hail Mary. And they paint their faces with skulls.

She thinks leaving dry bread in a drawer is taking care of someone. She's in love with a 10,000 year old corpse (the same one they worship). She spent ALL NIGHT digging with her bare hands to make sure a field had bones every 5 feet so she could fight her girlfriend - I mean, greatest enemy. Spoiler territory: She's been puppeting her parents corpses since she was 8 years old. Instead of grieving her dead girlfriend, she gives herself a lobotomy. She makes soup with bone in it so she can use the bone IN THEIR STOMACH to try and kill them.

The author is/was Catholic and the entire series had heavy Catholic overtones. https://www.tor.com/2020/08/19/gideon-the-ninth-young-pope-and-the-new-pope-are-building-a-queer-catholic-speculative-fiction-canon/ A good breakdown of how it's Catholic

Anti-propaganda (spoilers)

I love the Locked Tomb series but Harrowhark has daddy issues with God, had a childhood crush on God's cryogenic partner, and is in love with God's daughter, not to mention that she's essentially a bone-bender. The religion on her home planet exists in a way that is technically against the will of the canon in-universe God, even. All of this to say, Harrowhark is heretical at minimum if not an outright witch. Terrible Catholic. Burn her.

[humanpurposes]

Just for a moment, part iii

Tom Bennett has a habit of climbing through her bedroom window whenever he's in trouble // Main Masterlist

Tom Bennett x OFC

Warnings: 18+, mentions of war and death, friends to lovers, angst, fluff, smut, Tom Bennett's daddy issues

Words: 5400

A/n: Also available to read on AO3.

Monday 27th May, 1940

The morning starts off with a miserable drizzle. Kitty watches the grey fade to warmth through her shift, until the early evening sun shines brightly through the wide windows of the shop.

The month of May has very much been the same, cold and wet at first, but the weather has been clearing up nicely. Dad is devoted to the garden now, digging up the grass and planting vegetables in every free space he can. It’s on posters all over the shop: Dig For Victory. Live off spuds and SPAM when the rations run out.

Life feels mechanical; most days she doesn’t feel like a real person at all. All week she stands behind the counter, exchanging coupons for pitiful amounts of tea and sugar, stocking up the rack of newspapers and skimming over whatever horrors the headlines are screaming about that day. When she gets home, she pulls together some kind of dinner from what food they have while dad sits by the wireless. When mam gets home from the munitions factory, they gather around the table and eat in silence.

The house is so quiet without the boys. The only time it feels a little lively is when they get a letter from one of them, but they aren’t very consistent, especially considering there’s three of them.

Every so often, she gets a letter from Tom Bennett, but she tends to keep those to herself.

Her life has become a waiting game, she realises, existing between brief moments of happiness with nothing but her memories to entertain herself. She finds herself thinking about Tom an awful lot. It’s not so bad during the day when she has something to do, but when she lies alone at night, her mind can wander. She still leaves her window unlocked and huddles close to the wall because maybe— just maybe, he’ll come through the window and fill the space beside her.

Once she’s packed up the register and put up the shutters, she waves goodbye to Mr Gregory and leaves him to lock the door.

She runs into the postman at the top of Slade Grove. She feels slightly less guilty for not remembering his name when he greets her as “Catherine.” It’s what her teachers at school used to call her, and it’s what mam calls her when she’s in a particularly foul mood. Now it just puts her on edge.

“Can I give these to you now?” he says, handing her a stack of three envelopes. “Saves me a house later on.”

She flicks through them as she carries on walking. Two are addressed to Michael Wheelan and they look boring, letters from the bank or something official, but upon seeing the third she stops and smiles.

Miss Catherine Wheelan 28 Slade Grove Longsight, Manchester United Kingdom

It’s written in Tom’s handwriting.

She tears it open immediately, her eyes flickering between the page and the street ahead, weaving through any passersby.

Dear Kitty,

Sorry it’s been a while since the last one. Morale hasn’t been the best to be honest. Do you know what they’re calling the last eight months now? “The phoney war”. Apparently things are only going to get worse from here, not that it’ll help your nerves.

Thanks for checking up on dad for me. I do worry about him being on his own, with Lois being away and all. I wonder if she’ll be back yet by the time you get this. Have you heard much from your lads? I hope they’re doing alright.

You’ll be pleased to know I haven’t been picking as many fights, but sure you know me, sometimes I can’t help myself. I’ve been reading over what you said. I know it’s not helpful, I know it’s stupid, but then I’ve never been one to think things through, have I? I suppose that’s not much of an excuse. It’s instinctive. It’s like my head tells me what I’m doing is wrong, but I don’t know what else to do.

And we could die any day. Kitty, the state I’ve seen some of these men in…

The writing becomes crooked and trails off, ending with a smudge of ink.

Maybe I should write about something less depressing? Did I tell you about this gorgeous bird I met at Port Stanley?

Kitty’s heart drops.

Beautiful thing she is. The moment I saw her I knew I had to have her, so I stowed her away and brought her on board with me. She whistles a lot, and she has these lovely yellow feathers that really brighten up the bunk. She’s a noisy eater though, munches on seeds like she’ll never eat again. I’ve named her Vera.

I can see the look on your face now. Don’t worry, pretty Kitty, there’s no other bird that could ever replace you.

“Charming,” she mutters to herself.

I think I quite like these letters really, it’s nice to give myself a moment to think, even if I can’t hear from you straight away. That’s when I miss you the most, right after I’ve sealed the envelope and written your address. I hate the waiting.

She glances up, seeing she’s only a few doors down from her house.

I should have leave coming up soon. I’m looking forward to putting my legs on dry land and sleeping on a proper mattress…

She checks the top of the page. The letter is dated from weeks ago. “Soon” could mean anything.

… and the odd late-night tryst to see my fancy woman at number 28.

She scoffs a small laugh.

I bet you’d slap me for that. God I hope your mum doesn’t get her hands on this before you. Ey up Mrs Wheelan, see what I meant was, your Kitty’s a very well-mannered lady.

She purses her lips in an attempt not to laugh, coming to stop before her own front door.

Take care of yourself Kitty. Don’t spend too much time fretting over me.

Your dear friend,

Tom Bennett

Her smile fades quickly— why shouldn’t she worry about him?

It’s always the same with letters from Tom. Her heart leaps and for a few brief moments she feels so bright, just to have some kind of news from him. She could read pages and pages of his stupid ramblings and his moments of sincerity, but then it’s over all too soon. He signs off as her dear friend, then suddenly the words on the page are no longer new, and he’s still thousands of miles away, picking fights with his crewmates and launching shells at German ships.

The days pass slowly, but when she stops and looks back, the eight months have felt like nothing. Her life is flying past her and she hardly even notices, too caught up in the memory of those nights in September.

All for him to call her his fancy woman and feed her jokes about birds.

She knows better than to get her hopes up with Tom; she’s seen him go through every crush he’s ever had. He used to go through phases of ditching her for whichever sweetheart he was entertaining at the time, only to come crawling back to her when he’d inevitably cock it all up. Because he’s Tom Bennett, and he can’t help but make a mess of everything.

And like a good friend, she always kept her window unlocked for him, always held him when he needed it and did her best to set him straight. Because that’s what friends are supposed to do, surely, and he never said they were more.

Is that truly all she is to him? A dear friend, a listening ear and a convenient shag.

She rubs her fingers over her eyes because she will not cry over Tom Bennett. With the letter back in its envelope, she puts it into her bag and tries to find her keys, when she notices the smell of cigarette smoke. It’s hardly a rarity, but it makes her think of him.

For whatever reason, she glances over her shoulder at number 27. Low and behold, she sees a man with a cocky smile in a tight, white t-shirt, leaning in the doorway, lowering a cigarette from his mouth.

“Alright, pretty Kitty?” Tom says. “Was waiting for you to notice me–”

Suddenly she’s flying across the street and flinging her arms around his neck. She stands on her tiptoes to put her head over his shoulder and he leans into her, holding one arm over her back and one around her waist.

She closes her eyes. His breath is hot against her neck. He is here. He is real. He is more than a memory or words on a page.

Tom presses a soft kiss to her temple and she feels him smiling against her skin. “Take it you missed me then?”

She pulls away, holding back the urge to cry again, hardly able to catch her breath. This close, she can see every detail of him this close, the texture of his skin, the lines around his mouth and brows, the circles under his eyes, the scruff along the sides of his jaw, the little cleft on the tip of his nose. “Maybe a little bit,” she says.

She gives a little yelp of surprise when she feels him pulling her into the house. He closes the door behind them and then her back is against the wall, her handbag dropped by her feet.

Tom shrugs her coat from her shoulders before he surges in to kiss her, fiercely, desperately. Their bodies are tangled in one another, her hands in his hair, his tracing over the curves of her body through her dress.

And then he moves away. She tries to follow him only to realise he’s smirking.

“Missed me just a little bit?” he teases.

She wants to roll her eyes, but she just smiles. “Quite a bit.”

He drags his thumb over her lower lip, pulling it down to watch it come back into place.

Kitty huffs impatiently as she nudges her nose up into his.

Their eyes meet and the anticipation lasts a lifetime.

Tom hums as he leans in to kiss her again, slower and deeper, pressing her a little further into the wall by the firm hold on her waist.

“Missed you,” he utters between kisses, “so fucking much.”

She runs her hands over every part of him she can reach, his neck, the sharp line of his jaw, over his ears and into his hair.

“How long have you been back?” she breathes.

“Since this morning,” he says, coming to kiss her neck, the spot he knows will have her back arching against him.

“You didn’t come to the shop,” she says.

“Wanted to wait for you.”

She glances down the hallway, to the seemingly empty kitchen.

Tom huffs and pulls away from her, leaning with one hand against the wall. “Dad’s flogging his paper. Lois is out. Empty house for a few hours.”

She turns her head back to face him, pleased at the flush in his cheeks and the mess she’s made of his hair.

Tom’s eyes look down to her waist, where he presses his thumb into the fabric of her dress. “Come upstairs,” he says lowly, “I want to fuck you properly.”

She nods mindlessly, closing her hand around his as he leads her up the stairs, to a bedroom with two single beds, separated by a curtain. The room is about the same size as the boys’ bedroom in her house, but with only two beds, there’s enough space for two separate wardrobes. Her brothers make do with sharing everything.

Nothing about the room denotes Tom Bennett, not the floral wallpaper or the knitted throws on the beds. Not the books, perfume bottles and silver candelabras on the mantle, and certainly not the lingering scent of hairspray.

He leads her to the bed furthest from the door. She follows the stream of sunlight coming in from the window, and then she notices the details that are his. The ashtray and the empty beer bottle on the bedside table, the ditty bag and the pairs of boots at the foot of the bed, and the sailor’s hat left on the floor by the wardrobe.

The door closes and his footsteps tread softly behind her. His hands snake around her waist and turn her to face him.

She places her hands on his chest, running her hands over his torso, mapping his body through the soft cotton t-shirt. He feels firmer than he used to, a consequence of loading shells into guns and living off rations. She feels along his arms too, over muscles, veins, tendons and the scar below his bicep.

Tom presses a kiss to her forehead before he starts to undo the buttons on the front of her dress. A familiar restlessness rises in her belly, and suddenly she thinks she can’t bear to wait another moment. With the buttons undone, she puts her hands over Tom’s as he slides the dress down to the floor, along with her stockings and quickly slips out of her shoes.

She wastes no time unclasping her brassiere and muffles Tom’s awestruck groan by pressing her lips to his.

Somehow he manages to rid himself of his t-shirt and slacks without parting from her for too long, and he guides them both to the bed. She giggles as he lands on top of her and the metal bedframe squeaks.

“Now,” Tom says, pressing a delicate kiss to her neck. “Don’t have to worry about being quiet like we usually do, do we?”

“No…” Kitty breathes as he moves down, dragging his lips and tongue down her body. When he comes to her breasts, he cups one with his hand, and takes the other nipple in his mouth. Her head rolls back against the pillows but she brings her eyes back to him. She wants to cling to every moment, every sensation, all the movements of his tongue against her skin and his hair falling in front of his face.

“Eight fucking months,” he half growls as he moves further down, kissing along her stomach and running his hands over her hips. “I couldn’t stop thinking about you.”

She instinctively bites her lip when he ghosts his lips over her clothed cunt.

He tuts. “Don’t hold back on me now, sweetheart. I want to hear how much you missed me,” he says, curling his fingers around the hem of her underclothes before dragging them along her legs, leaving them somewhere on the floor.

He trails teasing kisses along her thighs. She squirms and whines every time he edges closer to her centre, until finally, he drags his tongue through her folds, from her entrance, up to her pearl with a deliciously agonising pressure. She doesn’t hold back the moans that sound in her throat, curling her fists through the bedsheets.

He works over her pearl with his tongue and lips, groaning against her as he does it and squeezing his fingertips into the flesh of her thighs.

It’s been so long since she’s felt like this, even on the nights when she felt herself getting too desperate, she can never quite match the feeling.

In a way it infuriates her that he can make her feel so good, but what’s worse than that is that he knows it. She can see his smug, half smile as he mouths at her cunt, so pleased at the noises she makes and the way her hips are starting to move against him.

She curls in on herself as her peak washes over her, but he manages to hold her down, right where he wants her, and keeps going until her whole body shudders and her legs are quivering.

“Fuck,” she breathes, “Tom…”

Even then he doesn’t give her much of a reprieve. He moves back for a moment before he positions her legs over his shoulders. His tongue is against her again, only now he moves lower, teasing over her entrance.

She whines impatiently.

“Fucking greedy, aren’t you?” Tom chuckles. He licks over her again— too much and not enough. “Just take it, take what I give you.”

But it doesn’t take long for him to slip his tongue inside her while his nose nudges against her. His name is a dreamy chant on her lips now. The pleasure rises and burns until she’s sure she can’t take anymore. She threads her fingers into his hair, gripping at it, urging him on, just a little more, and she’s sure she’ll fall apart.

Then he’s gone without warning, but he soon compensates the loss by replacing his tongue with a single finger.

Tom gazes up at her through his lashes. He keeps his eyes on her face as he pushes inside of her, deeper, deeper, until she takes a sharp intake of breath when he finds her sweet spot.

“Give me another one,” he groans, lowering his head down to circle his tongue over her. “Come on, pretty Kitty.”

She follows it like a command. Her second peak is sharper than the first and has her gasping for breath as she feels herself come undone around him.

“There you go,” Tom grins as he brings her legs from his shoulders and starts to make his way up her body.

He props himself over her, one hand on either side of her head. His silver chain, usually hidden below his shirt, dangles in front of her as their eyes meet. They breathe together, chests rising and falling in perfect unison.

He hesitates for a moment, before he places a lazy kiss to her lips. “God,” he utters, “you’re so fucking gorgeous, do you know that?”

“Just keep saying it,” she says.

He takes one of her hands and guides it down to his briefs. She traces her fingers over the hem before she slides underneath and wraps them around his already hard cock.

“Fuck—” Tom hisses through his teeth, his brow furrowed and his jaw tight. He reaches for the bedside table and hands her a condom. “Do the honours for me,” he grins.

She tears it open and reaches back down to slide it along his length.

Slowly, he lets his weight fall against her as he slides inside of her, burying his face into her neck and letting out a shaky breath against her skin.

She brings her arms around his shoulders as he rocks into her, gently at first, but she can feel that it’s not enough. His breaths are getting sharper and his thrusts harsher as he whimpers into her neck.

She holds him as tightly as she can, hoping it will somehow soothe the ache in her heart, because she still feels the absence of the last eight months. Because she can already feel the time slipping away.

Tom withdraws from her neck. “Look at me,” he pleads.

She does, and he brings his forehead to hers. His nose presses into hers and their lips barely brush over each other.

“You feel so good,” he says. His expression fades into something darker and more determined as he fucks her harder and faster, “so fucking tight.”

She feels it too, the urgency to make up for the time and the distance with a carnal need.

They reach their climaxes together, moaning into each other’s mouths and keeping their bodies tight together. It never feels close enough.

Once they’ve caught their breath and they feel their desire mounting again, Tom lies back on the bed and brings her to straddle him.

While the position isn’t unfamiliar, the movements are, but she’s eager enough, gauging both of their reactions as she grinds her hips against his. She goes slowly, at first, bracing herself against him while Tom keeps hold of her waist to guide her movements.

“Nice and slow, just like that,” he whispers, gazing up at her with a slight smile, “show me how much you missed me.”

She doesn’t care how the bed creaks under them, that she’s breathing and moaning too loudly. There’s something freeing and unashamed about how they fuck. Seeing Tom’s face twisted in pleasure and hearing his needy whines as he starts to buck his hips to match her movements.

And when another climax tears through her, she wishes she could drag the moment out forever.

Tom takes her in his arms as they collapse back on the bed.

She feels like she’s dreaming, not quite awake but still aware of whose arms are cradled around her, whose heartbeat she feels against her ear, who reaches for a packet of cigarettes and flicks his lighter.

They talk about things they’ve already discussed over letters, the bloody war and all the misery that comes with it. Life in Longsight seems dull in comparison to Tom’s tales of sea battles and antics on board the Exeter. But even in the middle of the Atlantic, in the midst of a war that’s consuming the whole world, he still found time to wind everybody up. She can’t tell if she hates him or admires him for it.

There’s something different about him. Where he used to sound so cocksure and carefree, his voice is duller.

Tucked under his shoulder, she shifts her head to get a better look at him, propped up against the pillows, taking drags from his cigarette, pouting his lips as he exhales the smoke and tapping the ash into the tray. Her eyes tell her it’s the same person, the same jaw, the same nose, the same lips, the same shade of blue in his eyes.

No… he looks different in the way his face falls. He seems less smug than he used to be. He seems tired, older, colder.

Of course he’s different, how could he not be? The war has reached every corner of the world, but he’s been in the thick of it.

“Your dad must be glad to have you back,” she says quietly.

Tom’s body tenses underneath her. He brings his cigarette to his lips again, giving a little irritated huff as he exhales. She wonders if that’s a thread she should avoid tugging on, but it already seems to be unraveling. He reaches to stub the cigarette out in the ashtray.

“I didn’t want to go back,” he mutters, his expression stern and sad. “I thought I was doing the right thing by going. I’ve spent enough of my life making a mess of everything, I thought if I did something good then…” he glances down at her, then shakes his head. “But I was so fucking scared—” his voice breaks his eyes are glistening.

Kitty sits up and clenches her hand around his. He’s trembling.

“You’re alright,” she says, softly, “you’re alright.”

He breathes quickly and she can feel his heart thundering in his chest. His descriptions of the attacks on the Exeter and the aftermaths had been brief, which she thought must have been a way to protect her from it on his part. Maybe he didn’t want it in writing, maybe he didn’t want to think about it once he had lived it, to be surrounded by fire, smoke and death at every turn.

“I thought dad would help me. I told him I didn’t want to go back, I thought he could help me somehow.”

“And what did he say?”

His nostrils flare as he huffs again. “He thinks it’ll be a bad look for the movement. He doesn’t think I’m genuine.”

Kitty strokes her thumb over his knuckles and his fingers tighten around hers.

“For a moment I thought he’d be pleased,” he says, his voice thick and coarse, “just for a moment.

She breathes through the tight feeling in her chest. “Maybe if you spoke to him again—”

“No,” he says bitterly. “Made up his mind now. Sure, what does it matter either way? I’m not much use here.”

The light feeling in her limbs is starting to fade. She feels solid and heavy where her body meet the mattress.

“Your dad needs you,” Kitty says, “and Lois.”

He scoffs.

“Don’t tell me you’re upset with her too?”

Tom frowns. “Stupid fucking mistake. What does she think she’s going to do now?”

“She told you then?”

“She sent a letter.”

Lois had called in a few weeks ago to tell them the news. Mam already had her suspicions, even though Lois was barely showing. She and dad were horrified, but of course they didn’t make that clear until after she had left. “A baby on the way and no husband, for shame.”

“She knows it was stupid, but she’s not asking anyone else to deal with the consequences,” Kitty says.

“All because she wanted to mess around with some posh boy.”

Kitty swallows down the dry feeling in her throat. “I don’t think what she did was much different to me and you.”

Tom looks down at her with wide eyes. “Me and you are different,” he says.

“How so?”

His lips shift, like he might say something, but he doesn’t. “I don’t know, I thought Lois was more sensible than this.”

“She’s certainly not done herself any favours, but you won’t help by being angry at her.”

“But she’s always been the responsible one, you know?”

“That’s not fair, Tom, she’s your sister not your mother.”

Tom stares up at the ceiling with his lips parted. “No… I suppose not.”

He turns his head into her. “I should never have gone in the first place.”

There’s lots of things that she thinks she would want to change. Sometimes she wishes Tom wasn’t so reckless and impulsive. She wishes he’d find an interest that wouldn’t end him up in trouble with the police. She wishes he really was a pacifist, and that way he would be here, and the only thing separating them would be a single street and two windows. It hurts to think of what could have been.

But those things cannot be changed, and even then, he wouldn’t be him. He wouldn’t be the Tom Bennett she’s adored for as long as she’s had memories of him.

She shifts against him, hooking her arm over her chest and her leg over his hips. “I know things are hard,” she says. “Just don’t leave them on a bade note. You’ll regret it if you do.”

They don’t speak for a while. The evening drags on, the sun dips lower in the sky, voices and the shouts of children sound from the street and Kitty is content lie beside him, listening to his heartbeat and his slow, controlled breaths, while he plays with her hair.

“I love you,” he breathes, so softly she thinks it might be a voice in her head. “When we got hit, it was all I could think about. That I might die then and there, and you’d never know.”

She feels her mouth break into a smile. “You love me?”

“Oh leave off, I’ve said it now,” he says with a grin.

They dress and he leads her downstairs to the kitchen. While he fusses with the kettle, Kitty takes a seat at the table.

“You’ve not met Vera yet,” Tom says over his shoulder, nodding at the small birdcage on the table. Inside, a little, yellow canary with black, beady eyes tilts her head and chirps.

“Hello, Vera,” Kitty says.

Vera chirps back.

Tom turns back around with a single cup of tea and a plate of toast. “Have to be stingy with the butter and milk, obviously,” he says setting them in front of her.

“Oh,” she says, “no, I won’t have any, don’t waste your rations on me.”

Tom angles his brows at her. “It’s not a waste.” He takes a seat in the chair opposite and lights a cigarette. “Come on, you’ve been on your feet all day.”

She hesitates before she reaches for the milk, spilling the smallest dash she can manage into the cup and skipping the sugar. Then she takes a cut of butter no larger than her thumbnail and spreads it across the toast. She takes a few tentative bites, ushering some back to him and tearing off a few crumbs to feed to Vera. Even the most mundane parts of life have become luxuries now.

“How long are you back for?” she asks.

“A week.”

“And then?”

“Off to Dover. They’ve got some big operation planned.”

“And will you be back after that?”

He draws his tongue between his lips. “I don’t know.”

Before long, the front door unlocks and Lois’ heels click through the hallways as she comes into the kitchen. “Dad not back yet?” she says, tossing her coat over the banister. She stops at the head of the table and looks between the two of them. She’s holding a brown paper bag. “Hello, Kitty. I’ve just been in to see your mum.”

“Oh she’ll be wondering where I am,” Kitty says, glancing across to Tom.

His chin is tilted down, and he looks up at her through the smoke with pleading eyes, like an injured puppy.

“Tell ‘em the Gregorys invited you up for tea,” Lois shrugs. She reaches into the bag and pulls out tiny pieces of clothing that are vaguely familiar to Kitty. “For the baby,” she says. “Thank God your mum kept all your old stuff.”

“Make do and all that,” Kitty says, briefly catching Tom’s eye.

She downs her tea and hurries to the hallway. Tom had left her coat over a sofa in the front room, and her bag is still on the floor. She tuts at his carelessness and shouts a farewell to Lois as Tom comes to see her to the door.

“Thanks for stopping by,” he says formally, with the corners of his mouth curled.

“Of course,” she replies, peering round his shoulder to see if Lois can see them.

Tom looks round too and smiles back at her as he leans into her ear. “A pleasure, as always, pretty Kitty.” He catches her lips in a quick peck before he opens the door for her.

She hurries across the street and finds her keys in her handbag. Before she opens her own door, she looks back to number 27. The glow of the spring evening beams off the red bricks of the houses and Tom looks golden, watching her through the haze of smoke from his cigarette.

It’s like before, all those months ago, before he first went away.

Each night, Tom steals into her bedroom. They kiss as quietly as they undress each other and set themselves down on her bed.

It gets more unbearable with every day that goes by. Each hour is an hour closer to carrying on with her life without him, when he’ll become another person to wait for, another reason why she wants this war to end.

On their last night, he fucks her from behind, keeping her mouth covered and muffling his own sounds in the crook of her neck. His breath and the hold on her mouth only makes her more desperate.

If anything, that first evening has ruined her, going back to gentle lovemaking is excruciating.

She quietly pleads for “more… more…”

Tom clamps his hand tighter around her mouth. “No, no, no, be a good girl,” he whispers harshly, “just be a good girl for me, Kitty.”

Once they’re both too tired to carry on, he wraps his arms around her. He tells her he loves her, and she says it back.

Dover is closer than the Atlantic at least, but the distance is all the same. He’ll still be gone.

She watches him as he dresses and follows him to the window. Before he leaves, he kisses her, deeply and desperately, pulling her still bare body against him.

When they move away for breath she gazes into his eyes. She could never forget them, the storm of blue and grey rings around his pupil, but he already feels like a memory, something intangible, there but not quite.

He presses a kiss to her forehead and his lips linger there. “When I get my next leave, I’ll come straight to you,” he says.

She doesn’t doubt it’s a promise he’ll keep. Tom Bennett doesn’t often make promises to her, but so far, he’s never broken one.

Tags (comment to be added to either)

General taglist: @randomdragonfires @jamespotterismydaddy @theoneeyedprince @tsujifreya

Series taglist: @hanula18 @azxulaa @whoknows333

[idkwhatever580]

Agatha All Along Commentary

⚠️WARNING⚠️ AGATHA ALL ALONG 1x6 SPOILERS AHEAD

you’ve been warned

Im late again guys 😣 alright. Here goes nothing. I’m seriously considering taking my anxiety meds before these episodes because atp that might help.

Started watching at 3:00 pm

I stg I stg I stg I stg if this turns out bad I’m gonna throw up. And that says a lot considering I have emetophobia

Ooh fancy he’s Jewish

I’m not familiar with the Jewish religion but seems pretty cool.

Okay so we have established that this is Billy Kaplan which idk how y’all dug so deep to figure it out but I guess it was common knowledge and I do not have common knowledge so it adds up

Ooh now there’s a party funnn lol

I wish I had parents that were proud of me

Lmaooooo “you’re both disgusting” is so fucking real

4:25

ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???

She’s kinda hot guys. I have daddy issues but I’m a lesbian lmaoooo

5:14

WTFFFF I CANT DO THIS SHIT I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IT MEANS BUT SHES TOTALLY LYING TO HIM IN THIS

5:42

wtf does the tower reversed mean bitch

6:14

Hearing her say baby is so fucking hot I’m gonna nut everywhere

Oh lord guys I seriously have problems… but don’t say you weren’t thinking it too 😏

6:51

WTF IS THAT THING A PROTECTION SPELL OR WHAT?!?!

DID SHE PLACE THE SIGIL?!?!

Omg if she placed the sigil on him that would be insane

7:46

If y’all out there with the theories about Billy maximoff’s soul taking over Billy kaplan’s body im kms because that’s so valid

——id like to let y’all know that I know nothing about the marvel comics and I do not intend on learning or digging that deep kk? I also don’t know what Wiccan is but I guess it’s Billy maximoff? Not looking for someone to explain it tho lol——

IM SCARED J DONT WANNA SEE MY BABY

NO WANDA NO WANDA I DIDNT NEED TO HEAR HER VOICE

8:34

Holy shit.

8:39

Watching it disappear is so sad. Like I know she’s hurting and saving the rest of them

9:00

OH MY GOD THE PARENTS STAYED ALIVE I THOUGHT YALL SAID THEY ALL DIED OR LIKE TWO DEATHS

9:33

NO FUCKING WAY THIS SHIT IS ACTUALLY TRUE

Y’all playing too hard

9:52

No fucking way. I’m actually so done right now. I’m so fucking done I need to scream at someone and it needs to be the fucking producer

10:15

That must be so fucking scary to go to “sleep” as Billy Maximoff and wake up in someone else’s body. Like in Disney shows when they switch and shit they have a moment where they look in the mirror and scream but this is def more realistic

Also I thought someone said there were two deaths. I don’t see no dead people up in this bitch

10:55

wtf is this?? inside out?

11:06

Noooohohohoooooo I forgot that Billy M can mind read and shit

12:33

That dog knows

Why is it always the dog that knows?

13:44

Having to call her mom must have sucked balls

15:22

Damn he already trying to fit the part bro. Moving on too damn fast

Him and his mom with the lying bro ✋🙄

Stop I sound like Agatha 😭

16:02

SHE DID PLACE THE SIGIL ON HIM WTFFFF

16:26

Okay I see you little emo gay kid having more piercings than me and having kissed more people than me and I’m older than you 🙄

17:26

Damn that’s crazy. He actually is telling this dude his shit

18:40

Damn that’s so fucking crazy his smile is creeping me out bro

Also I totally knew little Billy M was meant to be a little gay baby

19:24

Damnit all of these hoes have connection with him. Of some kind

19:57

You found a guy on Reddit. And you’re meeting him? That sounds like you’re getting killed.

OMG WHO IS IT TELL ME WHO IT IS

ITS RALPH NO ITS RALPH POOR RANDALL SORRY RANDALL ITS JUST WE KNOW YOU AS RALPH

21:06

Damn he went kinda crazy from being with Agatha all that time huh? That means the only one that can handle her is rioooooo

21:42

Don’t take my wife’s name in vain hoe

lol I’m kidding

I also apparently have multiple wives

Lmaoooo please ask about Agatha harkness

24:06

YOU FUCKING MURDERED SPARKY I WILL NEVER EVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS I DONT CARE IF SHE MADE YOU DO THAT SHIT I HATE YOU

24:19

Omg I can’t do this shit

Does this mean that Tommy is also in someone’s body?

25:27

I seriously do wanna know what kind of crazy that lady eats for breakfast. And I hope it’s me 😏

26:24

Yeaaaahhhh this song eats me up.

27:20

HOHOHOHHHHH THAT PICTURE IS THE IMAGE OF A FA- a gay woman. A gay witchy woman…. 👀

27:36

OH YEAH THEY BROUGHT MY GIRL DOLLY INTO IT

DOLLY PARTON FOR PRESIDENT 2024

Ahem… excuse my political views ✋😭

28:20

Omg omg omg he’s going on the road to find Tommy I’m gonna cryyyyy

29:43

Oh he’s so emo with his eyeliner and his black heart boyfriend and his belt chain and his witchy witchyness

…okay maybe im jealous

29:55

Ugh mommy. They’re both so hot. I know we only see Agatha in this part but I’ll nut to the thought of Aubrey Plaza

30:06

You’re seriously using a fucking house lamp you idiot ✋😭

30:29

You tell me to stop I’ll do it mommy

OH LAWD I HAVE ISSUES

I have to shit bro 😭

31:07

Hooligan is so fucking funny 😭

31:33

Guys I’m nutting everywhere from her sitting like that she’s soooo gayyyyyy

The producer really said “gay” and Kathryn Hahn said “yes”

32:16

I think if I was in that situation as teen, I’d say I want to. I want to poke that damn bear and see if she’ll throw me on the desk and- oh. Right right. Not the point ✋😭😏

I ALSO JUST REALIZED THAT SHE IS WEARING A SHIRT THAT IS RALPHS RANDALLS? Idk anymore bro

32:59

Wait… this is so fucking funny bro 😭😭😭

33:45

OMG SHES LIKE IN THE INTERROGATION TABLE AND ITS ACTUALLY HER HOUSE BRO

I NEVER MADE THAT CONNECTION 😭😭😭

34:21

HOT HOOOTTTTT SHES SO HOT RIPPING THAT TAPE IS SO HOT

34:28

THATS SO FUCKING FUNNY BRO

34:46

Hold on these side swipe things are going too fast I’m so lost. 😭 I hate having a horrible memory that makes me not be able to remember every single detail when we’re going back to something from a different pov

35:10

STFU SHE COULDNT HEAR EITHER TIME AND BOTH TIMES HE SAID SOMETHING DIFFERENT I WONDER WHAT HE SAID ON THE ROAD WITH THE OTHER WITCHES

35:19

YEEESSSSS IM SK GLAD WERE BACK TO THE ROAD

35:28

Yes! Pull yourself out of that mystery goop!!!

36:11

FUCK YOU BITCH FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUCK YOU DONT BREAK THE SIGIL PIECE FUCK YOU

37:53

Wait. I am so gullible I like her being nice bro ✋😭

38:00

COVERED IN MYSTERIOUS ROAD GOOP OR NOT THAT POSE IS FUCKIGN HOT

38:09

I can’t tell if she’s crying because she’s happy the SIGIL is broken and she’s right or if she’s crying because she actually liked the kid

38:33

FUCK SHES BEING EVIL AGAIN I NEED A GOOD AGATHA AND I KNOW IM NOT GETTING THAT BUT A GIRL CAN DREAM

38:45

I’ll kill someone for you Agatha

39:05

Wait when she’s like don’t feel guilty about your talent I feel like she’s trying to be evil but it’s kind of endearing. Like. Shes so strong about it which means so many witches have felt guilty about their talents before and she doesn’t want that to hinder him. Even if she is evil that’s pretty sweet.

39:53

OH FUCK YOU BITCH KYS KYS HAHA THATS WHY YOU CANT USE YOUR POWERS BECAUSE YOU HAVE TO BE GOOD GOOD NOT DECENT GOOD

40:43

Stfu Agatha. Don’t mess with our bitch.

Robo papa? BAHAHAHAHAHAAA

she knowsssss

41:34

BAHAHAHHAAHAAAAA

42:02

“Got it” not her being serious for once ✋😭

42:25

DONT I KNOW IT BITCH YOU DIDNT HAVE TO TELL ME IM WATXHING YOU LITTLE MAXIMOFF BITCH

Post watching notes:

I seriously needed some Agathario shit and I didn’t get that and I’m mad. IM SO MAD THAT THE INTIMACY COORDINATOR WAS FOR TEO LITTLE BOYS I NEEDED MY MIDDLE AGE WOMEN TO MAKE TF OUT THEY ARE TEASING ME 😖😖😖

[29daffodils]

10 BL People That I Want Carnally

i was tagged by the lovely @thisautistic

I'm so sorry i took so long for this, hun, but I'm going through a lot of hectic things in life at the moment and i am ✨ stumped ✨

now, while I'm very much asexual and my only “carnal” thirst for them exists because i kin??? them, i would have also absolutely gone and banged them (theoretically speaking) if i weren't ace because we are so alike. so it's essentially my favourite BL boys 😂

and here's my pick (in mostly chronological order)!

(also this does get a little too personal, hence the cut.)

1. vegas (kinnporsche the series)

ohhhh what to say about my man, my perfect little imperfect psychopath [affectionate] meow meow

if you'd have put me in a BL, this would have been me. yes, with all those daddy issues and possesiveness and swag. he is the ultimate man i'd go for. also because i absolutely always fall for the red flag men lmao

2. alan (moonlight chicken)

alan beat pete to the 2nd spot simply because he is me and i am him in actual real adult life. we are workaholics, like to treat our s/o with expensive food, remember every anniversary date to the point of being called clingy and obsessive and always want to know what we did wrong because there must be a logic to it, oh! we also get pissed when being two timed, yes. and we surprisingly grow a spine when we realise what our worth is in someone's life.

like listen there was no way i couldn't have fallen for alan, but also because glasses and…. i really dig men with glasses okay?? but also, first. nobody could have done it like first. i want a man as whipped as he is for gaipa.

3. pete (kinnporsche the series)

oooof what can i say about him. i always say he is a “fast fists, big hits” kinda guy and so am i. we like to meld into the background, hoping nobody perceives us. add to it all the trauma and hopeless loyalty towards red flag men. we are basically besties. and i love him very much. i'd totally marry him.

oh, yes, kissing is also, for people we like only.

4. ray (only friends)

he is my other meow meow because i wanna give him everything i never got. also we are both people who have shitty friends and they only come when we are suicidal lmao. two hands aren't enough to count the amount of times we've been told we are too burdensome. ray needs a weighted blanket for his sadness and while he is rich and can buy 10 of them, i'd like to pamper him anyway.

5. sand (only friends)

last but not the least, sand. my boy sand. he is kind to a fault. he loves endlessly. he is everything that i am but also what i wish i could become. and we both love rock music and arctic monkeys (because awesome taste, really).

if i ever manage to land myself a guy, i wish i get him. because he is the gold standard. truly.

okay, that's about it. this is all the BL i've ever watched and the others i have before, i don't really feel much for the characters.

i'll tag @boyslovecorner @peachym00 @ae-azile if they'd like to do it, but please feel free to ignore! 🌸

[shinra-makonoid]

These days I cannot sleep correctly I fucked up my sleep schedule and I am stressing out about the results from the exams of the first semester. I should be ok, not as good as I wanted but not bad at all either, but as long as I don't know it is a nightmare to live. I could go on and on about how I didn't have a good time at all during the exams, I was sick of everything, I hate competition, I hate MCQs. I'm not at all looking forward to the second semester, but now I'm in this shit so I gotta do it. I love the subjects I'm studying, I love what I'm learning about, even chemistry I kinda digged it towards the end, but the competition part of it is horrible. You just don't live anymore, you frantically study all you can and then rest and then do it again the next day until you can't do it anymore. Fast food learning. Thank fuck I waited to be a little bit emotionally stable before doing all of this because otherwise I would have broken down.

So you get my stream of thought at almost 7 am after I woke up at 3:30.

I was also thinking about when the group went to the Christmas market. We overall had a good time, but I couldn't help but feel very nasty towards our most catholic member of the group, mainly because of his homophobia, transphobia and racism, the whole package. Like... He can't help it, even though everyone is like you're nasty, he just is like that, obsessions regarding the oppressed class of people who did him no harm. I accept that this is due to severe brainwashing from religion and I have hope for change, especially if I come out at some point and he believes me (because I did say what if I was trans and he laughed like it was impossible, I love this but also yeah), but it takes time. Considering how good he is at medschool I'm pretty sure he'll manage to pass, so I have to make peace with the fact I'll be knowing him for 10 years (if I do pass).

Anyway one other thing that bothered me is that obviously he votes for alt right people, maybe Zemmour, the very hardcore people who don't help the poor, are racists, full economic liberalism etc etc. And then we crossed paths with a homeless guy who sells newspapers (it's a thing here), and the guy decided to, not buy him the newspaper, but to pay him warm Christmas food. He was all happy having done his good deed, said "I hope he's a real homeless guy", and that was it.

It sickened me, between the hypocrisy (between the way he votes, he way he thinks of homeless/oppressed people, the fact he thinks paying for food is gonna change anything at all) the obvious pride because he has money he can buy that stuff without feeling stressed out about lacking ressources or having to sacrifice anything (which I believe is uncatholic of him but I mean in general he's very far from the way I was influenced through Jehovah Witnesses, so there's a huge clash in core spiritual culture even if I don't subscribe to JW or any religion.).

But I breathe and try to remember he's 18 and brainwashed. All the other people from the group are adorable, except him and one other guy who is clearly a creep, I'm not using that word lightly he has issues with how to behave with women (and he's also religious... Like.... Religious guys please be normal challenge). But again they're victims too etc.

It's difficult to navigate between the self and the ideals and balance it. Because I want to tell them to fuck off and bite their head off. I also believe in the potential of growth for everyone. That day I did get a little bit passive aggressive about his faith in sky daddy and I regret it.

[casspurrjoybell-33]

Wreckless - Good Advice

*Warning Adult Content*

Emmett

Not all of his towers stand up... only about half do the first time but we get the front wall done and he starts working on the decorations while I take a minute to look for Quincy and Rhys again.

I spot them and wave and they head over and Rhys runs right up and sits down next to Finnegan.

"You have lots of toys."

Quincy is carrying a ton of stuff, including a big umbrella.

"You're smart bringing an umbrella," I tell him.

Maybe we should get one.

"Irish boys," he says.

"I swear to God that Rhys burns just watching the weather report for a sunny day. Umbrella works great but it's a bitch to lug around."

I thought Finnegan was bad but he is a bit darker complected.

I help Quincy get the umbrella set up so the shade falls right on the castle that they're busy working on.

Apparently they've decided to go fill the buckets together, one each.

Works for me.

Rhys comes over while Finnegan is turning over the buckets.

"I wanna get some toys, please?"

"I think you two have plenty for today but we can get you some as long as you leave all of Finnegan's here. Understand, Reese's Pieces?"

"Yes. I won't steal his toys and you get me some."

"Exactly. Now go play."

He scurries back under the shade of the umbrella and Quincy sighs.

"So much work but so worth it. It's hot... I'm gonna dip real quick if you don't mind keeping an eye on them."

"Go for it."

I watch Finnegan and Rhys while he's gone and they seem to be getting along.

The conversation right now, from what I can tell, is about the best moat excavation tool and whether or not they should try to dig it all the way to the water so that it will fill by itself.

A wet, much happier Quincy pops back into the chair next to mine.

"Much better, thanks. How long have you two been together?"

It's a fair question but not an easy one to answer.

"It took us forever. We danced around each other for awhile but we've been... lets call it... four months, total. And you guys?"

"About two years. This is our anniversary trip. We live just north of Baltimore, little town called Havre de Grace."

That's not too far, actually.

"I know it, grew up in Baltimore and still live there. West side just down past Security."

"It's a small world. Right?" Quincy says because that's what everyone says, when you find out you live within an hour of someone.

"It's nice to meet you and Finnegan... the odds of meeting another little... they're rare as hen's teeth. Are you Finnegan's caregiver or are you a daddy dom?"

I know just enough to answer that question... at least I think.

We have sex so it's...

"A daddy dom. You are too, right?"

"Yeah. I did caregiver with my first little and then I realized it was a lot more fun, if I got to fuck them. Releases some of the stress, you know?"

I've been called blunt and pretty straightforward before but Quincy may even have me beat.

"Hard to say no to that. Although it's taking us a while to work it all out. We're both new to this."

"Sex or littles?" he asks, laughing and he smacks his thigh.

"I'm kidding. Finnegan seems pretty easy-going. The older ones are little bit easier to handle than the young ones. They still have their own issues, though."

This is my chance to ask a question that's been bothering me for a while now.

"Finnegan falls out of little head-space so easily. I don't know if it's because me. I'm probably saying things I shouldn't be but he loves little-space when he gets there."

"The older ones struggle more with it in my experience. I'm not saying you're not messing up because you're new to this so of course you are. Hell, I still mess up sometimes. But I think the less difference there is between their adult persona and their kiddie persona, the easier it is to switch between them. Once you get a toddler into headspace, you can keep them there easily. Finnegan is a little more independent so he's doing some things for himself.... I'm guessing and it's much easier for him to do more than he should and ends up switching. It's also really easy for you to say things to him that you wouldn't really say, to an eight-year old because he's not doing baby-talk."

That all makes perfect sense.

"Thanks. I'll think about all that. It makes sense."

"He's not full-time, right? Is he full-time with you?"

Full time but not full time? 

Huh?

"What do you mean?"

"Does he work?"

Too much and too hard. 

"Yeah, he has a high-stress, corporate job."

"Are you home full time or...?"

I am not a kept man. 

"No. I'm a mechanic."

"Thank God for normal people. Seems like everybody says they're a lawyer or doctor.  You had me worried, with the corporate thing." 

I know exactly what he's talking about. 

"I have a Sliding-Company and Rhys is an Elementary-School Teacher. But when he's with me he is always in little-space. Do you guys switch? I'm guessing so, from what you said."

"Yeah. We just go with the flow."

We get interrupted by Rhys and Finnegan wanting us to look at the sand-castle.

"That looks great, boys," Quincy says and I tell them the same.

They're going to test the moat with water now and I wish them luck.

When Quincy and I get back to our deck-chairs, he apologises for the interruption and his.

"I'm sorry," Quincy says. "You and Finnegan might want to re-consider flipping around like that. But hey, you have to do whatever works for you guys. I'm not the damn 'King of Daddy-Doms' like all those kids on the internet."

He's funny.

"I've seen some crazy threads. I've been looking for information but it's really pretty hard to find and half of it sounds like it's been written by... I don't know."

"By high-schoolers, who think they're a little... when all they are, is pretentious assholes, who haven't grown the fuck up yet," he finishes.

"And they think they know everything. I got into an argument with a biological twelve year old once because he said he was a little and I said he was too damn young to be one. That's when I got off Reddit. I'm dry again. I'm gonna try to get Rhys into the water with me also. He needs a break but he's not gonna want to take one. Still, he's gotta be hot and sweaty."

"I'll toss Finnegan in too... maybe it'll be easier if they both go."

We walk over and spend a few minutes congratulating them on the castle and then convince them to take a break.

I ask Finnegan if he wants me to throw him in but he says he's going to be brave and do it all by himself this time.

We'll see if he finds the courage.

[silverwolf1249]

Alright y'all it's been over a year since I made this rec list and I decided to got digging in my bookmarks once more and update it (if you want to try excavating further, I welcome you to the cesspit that is my bookmarks tab on ao3).

*Please read all tags and all of the summary just to make sure it doesn't have anything you don't like/want*

Clark/Bruce:

Lex Joins the League by metukah; short sweet hilarious

Strangers When We Meet by Trista_zevkia; I'll admit I haven't read this one in a bit so it's a bit fuzzy but my tags say "bruce wayne is bad at communicating" "like so bad" and "superman so horni on main bc alien biology said so" so make of that what you will

Superman Reads Thirst Tweets for Charity  by wewillalwaysenduphere; comedy fucking gold people

I'm just really into BDSM, Kind Truths, Can You Hear Me? by Mawiiish; what's a little identity porn between two superheros?

Batman and Bruce Wayne are Dating?! by Glowzilla48 I do love me some identity porn superbat + fmk lol

How to Date a Superhero by solomonara, mostly the 2nd work, all of it's great tho

Fake Empires by copperbadge; second person POV from Clark, more identity porn (ur prob seeing a trend here lol)

No one could save me, but you by HuntedPrincess; hnnnnnnnn

unofficially official by Soundsgaytbh (orphan_account); only in some works of this series (maybe only one I can't remember) but the whole series is great

smokin' in the boys' room by TheResurrectionist; y'all this author in general is chef's kiss

Floundering by freedvmrouge; meet cute except they've met lol

The Sit-Down by Ginevra_Benci; clark is v stressed, bruce tries to help but not in the sexy way

Hal/Bruce:

Am I The Asshole? by FabulaRasa; you need an account to read this series but it's absolutely worth it if you don't already have one

(incomplete)It was a joke! by Devilhorn; is technically mult ship but endgame hal/bruce. Anyone remember the post where the league bets bruce he wouldn't be able to kiss all of them without revealing his identity? yah that and its glorious

Constantine/Bruce:

(incomplete)constant comment by Unpretty; very minor brucie, but I love their dynamic so I added it :)

Slade/Bruce:

here as I am by TheResurrectionist; special mention since it's not strictly brucie wayne but like also a tiny bit?? Like it's giving brucie wayne vibes even though it's just bruce. Dat smut tho, and the superbat sequel ;)

Mult. Ships:

(incomplete)The Batchelor by sardonic_sprite, SkullKitten; mmmm that's some good food right there *slam slam*, only 1 chapter rn but what a glorious chapter it is

Gen/No Relationship:

Bruce is - involuntarily, if he may add - the president of Gotham by soyasauce can't believe I forgot to recc this one last time it's so fucking funny enjoy crack galore

The Sexy Mug Prank by Nokomis; admittedly the teeniest, tiniest mention of Brucie but I love me a Bruce prank fic and some bonding w Steph!

Brucie Wayne Gets Into A Fistfight With A Supervillain  by Roses_Bloom_In_Greenland; sad it's short but it makes it all up and more with its sheer existence and it bullies lex, we love bullying lex in this Christian household

(incomplete) Two Sides of a Coin (You Can't Have One Without the Other) by Nation_Ustria; hnnnn 2 of my fav tropes smashed into a fic, cryptid batfam + the waynes being the waynes. The concept and worldbuilding is immaculate and I love this story so much.

Spicy? Nah. by cripskis; ok so not brucie brucie, but it's brucie and we love him

Daddy Issues by That_One_Curly_Haired_Fangirl; absolutely living for bruce trolling tf out of everyone frfr, also hilarious

Identity Confusion by That_One_Curly_Haired_Fangirl same author and series as above, but deserved its own special mention bc yass brucie gatekeep girlboss gaslight

Batman Fatale by schrijverr; mmmm love me a brucie voice on a bat furry body

I got better things to do by Amisti same description as above but with more fuckery lol

Space cellmates by BoredomBeckons; superbat if you squint but otherwise identity porn galore

glitter & silk by sparkycap; oddly wholesome and I love the jason bruce bonding

Funding The Batman or Fucking The Batman by HeartfulCakes; barry/bruce and clark/bruce if you squint, loved this one so much, so much identity porn and bruce loving his children and his children being protective of him

Tell Me Your Secrets (I Already Did) by Athi816; superbat if you squint, but also bruce is sooo bad at communicating but he tries lol

Marvel Crossover:

Knaves All Three by Ginevra_Benci, an absolute gem imo, I love this one so much it makes me laugh every time

Just Another Day by TheResurrectionist; HAHA STEVE NO

No, no, I was hired to kill Batman. by SomeSortofItalianRoast; Natasha gets her time to shine in this one

So, how long have the two of you been married?  by SomeSortofItalianRoast; I cannot explain how much I love Bruce and Tony banter

when you, a Queen, come across another Queen, and discuss how best to maximize your joint by graveltotempo; I dream of the day they make a fic with Oliver and Bruce absolutely yassified and maximizing their joint slay as they deserve

White Collar Crossover: I'll be honest a lot of my white collar x batman bookmarks with bruce in them usually have at least a lil brucie wayne, same w my marvel x batman bookmarks

Suspension of Disbelief by Amateum; cute, if neal was dick and went to a gala where bruce was

Imperial Green by Ginevra_Benci; neal/bruce, I love this series and the Malones appear which I always love me a matches malone and fam fic.

*Note* There absolutely are more I bookmarked with Brucie Wayne that I just forgot to tag properly. I might come back and add another addition to this later lol

I desperately need more rich bitch drama queen brucie wayne content, especially when the JL and/or batfam get involved. Pretty sure I've scoured the whole fandom for more and can't find any I haven't already read and that's absolutely tragic.

[sweetmusingss]

“Oh please, they will be hyping you up too. Not as much as me obviously but I am your #1 fan and your groupie. No one can get on my level. I mean, your mom can but it’s a little different,” I giggle softly before lighting up when you said you wanted to take me out to dinner tonight and you had a surprise for me. I loved when you surprised me and I was instantly excited. “Yes, Daddy. You can definitely take me out tonight but only if you pick out my outfit and you help me get ready,” I smile at you, checking the time on your watch. “I need to get out of these scrubs and take a shower first though. You’d really be doing me a solid by helping me here,” I bat my lashes at you. I truly was indecisive and it was more than just a kink for me. It helped me get ready so much quicker when you helped me out.

‘Please don’t lump yourself and my mom in the same category if you’re my groupie, baby. Come on.” He makes a fake puking sound, pretending to cringe, loving to tease you and be silly like this with you. He nodded eagerly as you mentioned needing to shower, “Yes, ma’am. Let’s get you in the shower. We need to get all the sexual tension out of you before my surprise tonight... it’s a G rated sort of night, baby.” He grips behind your thighs and lifts you easily, smiling up at you as he carries you to the bathroom. He sets you down on the counter before turning on the shower and getting it to the perfect temperature and then turning to you, prepared to help you get undressed since he knew you loved that.

__

Frank was about to apologize to Kayleigh but before he could, she was saying that he would never sleep with a student. That made him feel sick and he hated that she made him feel like some old creep who preyed on you. She had no idea what happened between the two of you and she would never be able to understand. He so badly wanted to snap at her that he didn’t just sleep with you, he fell in love with you. He knew better than that though and he took a deep breath, shaking his head a bit. “It’s fine, don’t worry about it. I need some fresh air before my show though and I will see you after,” he said, kissing her forehead gently before stepping off of the bus. He felt incredibly overwhelmed and like he was going to be sick. He just needed some space right now or he was going to have a real meltdown. Kayleigh didn’t know about his issues with anxiety either or how he could feel cornered if he didn’t remove himself from high-stress situations.

Gabe looked over to see Frank rushing outside and he felt bad for the woman standing there looking so confused. “You owe me,” he says lowly to you, knowing you desperately wanted to run after Frank and you were probably the only one who could calm him down too. He walked over to Kayleigh, towering over her so she couldn’t see you if you snuck outside. “Hey, I’m Gabe,” he introduced himself to her, flashing her a charming smile. 

I smile as Gabe walks over to Kayleigh, knowing that my best friend was the greatest person alive. I sigh, waiting a few moments before sneaking off the bus, making sure Kayleigh was intently listening to Gabe who was probably talking about nothing just to keep her attention. I look around once I was off the bus, spotting Frank and walking over to him. I was already digging in my bag and pulling out a pack of cigarettes, knowing that the movement of him lighting and smoking a cigarette would help anchor him and alleviate some of his anxiety. “Hey... you okay?” I hand him the cigarette and the lighter, just working on instinct with him, knowing exactly what he needed before he even asked for it and probably before he knew he needed it himself.

[bobastay]

When he-he when-when he 😳😳

This man is 23 & is giving me the vibes of a 40 year old D&LF who's divorced, works in corporate & has his kids on the weekend.

'The kids are at their mom's, we can spend the whole weekend together. Let me take care of my princess mmh?'

He just- he just looks like the type of man that would call his partner 'princess'.

I just don't understand how he is so young, barely an adult-

And already has the energy of a dad who would wear a suit to his kid's high school graduation.

Ppl say Hongjoong Stan's have daddy issues.

Heck no- it's the Yunho & Jongho Stan's.

At 23, you cannot get more d&lfy then this.

18+ content minors DNI

I'M- I'M W E A K

please i'm obsessed with the whole d!lf concept it's just so rkwkdowjdo idk why but it's the hottest thing

AND COMBINING THAT WITH PRINCESS????? you've literally killed me. he would call you all kinds of pet names, sweetheart, darling, dear... but he's in love with the way your cheeks go red when he calls you his princess because that's exactly what you are to him <3

you make him feel alive again, make him feel a way he'd never thought he'd feel after his divorce.

"you keep me young, baby doll~" he tells you as you take a nightly stroll with him. he thinks you're perfect, not to mention his kids actually love you. he was nervous they wouldn't like a step mom that's... just slightly older than them oop sorry the age gap fiend in me came out-

he's so happy when you get along with them and treat them like you're own. you've been so understanding knowing this kind of change had to be hard to go through for both him and his kids, so kind offering your help in anyway they needed, even reaching out to his ex wife which was awkward at first but you wanted to be in yunho's life permanently so you knew it was something you would have to do eventually. it took her some times, but eventually she started to love you too, knowing how much you loved her kids and they loved you.

you were his perfect little angel and he treated you as such, always making sure reward you for being so sweet to him and his family.

"Yun- i just came for lunch!" you giggle as his lips kiss down your neck, tickling you. he splays his hands out on your thighs after he's sat you on his desk in front of him.

"Mmm, i know darling. I'll save it for this weekend." he pulls away with a wink. you raise your brow in confusion.

"the weekend? but the kids-"

"they'll be with their mother this time. but don't worry, i know you'll keep me plenty of company." you blush as he smirks and leans back in to kiss you.

"we can spend it together, baby. just you and me, what do you say? are you going to let me take care of my sweet princess?" he asks, rhetorically of course.

~

"fuck! oh, yes! mmmm-" your head is thrown back into the pillow, back arched and arms on either side of you grasping the sheets. Yunho's tall figure leans over you, nails digging into the flesh of your hips and thighs as his long, thick cock slides in and out of your warm, wet, swollen cunt.

"fuck, princess. we've been doing this all day and you're still so fucking tight, damn~" he lets his body fall forward, supporting his weight with one of his arms as he continues to rock his hips into you. he presses his sweaty forehead to yours, lost in the feeling of your breath fanning against his face as you pant like a bitch in heat.

"you were made for me, baby girl. made to be my sweet and obedient little princess. always so good to me."

"fuck, you love this don't you? being a prize for an older man like me, taking such good care of me and letting me fuck you so good in return, hmm? awe, did that get you riled up more? you're squirming, it's so cute~"

haha woooah legs wobbly.

don't he fooled, this man is so in love with you and so happy you're with him. you have him wrapped around your finger, always at your beckon call <3

[catholic-character-tournament]

Round 4 - Catholic Character Tournament

Propaganda below ⬇️

Harrowhark

I'm pretty sure you've already got plenty of submissions for her so I'll just say she was raised in what is basically a cult (technically a nunnery but let's be real) dedicated to keeping the body of the thing that will kill God behind the rock. One of their prayers is actually "I pray the rock is never rolled away". Harrow is extremely devout as penance for her earlier heretical actions in the tomb as a child (spoiler!) so the Catholic guilt really comes through

imagine being a catholic nun and you meet god, but it turns out he’s a twitch streamer from new zealand who became god because everything got a little bit out of hand. and just before you met him you gave yourself a diy grief-fuelled lobotomy with the help of your best frenemy. imagine how insane you’d be. now multiply that insanity by nine. that’s the fictional love of my life right there.

she meets god. she’s not inspired

she’s number one practitioner of space Catholicism. The locked tomb is chock full of Christian (catholic) imagery themes metaphors etc. just look at her she’s got a bone rosary

They're Catholicism with extra bones. Everyone is a nun. They have what is basically a rosary made from knuckle bones. They technically worship the same God as everyone else, but they're waaaay more focused on The Body in the Tomb (Mary) and we get a moment where we find out that while everyone else prays the equivilent of The Lords Prayer, they're doing the equivilent of Hail Mary. And they paint their faces with skulls.

She thinks leaving dry bread in a drawer is taking care of someone. She's in love with a 10,000 year old corpse (the same one they worship). She spent ALL NIGHT digging with her bare hands to make sure a field had bones every 5 feet so she could fight her girlfriend - I mean, greatest enemy. Spoiler territory: She's been puppeting her parents corpses since she was 8 years old. Instead of grieving her dead girlfriend, she gives herself a lobotomy. She makes soup with bone in it so she can use the bone IN THEIR STOMACH to try and kill them.

The author is/was Catholic and the entire series had heavy Catholic overtones. https://www.tor.com/2020/08/19/gideon-the-ninth-young-pope-and-the-new-pope-are-building-a-queer-catholic-speculative-fiction-canon/ A good breakdown of how it's Catholic

Anti-propaganda (spoilers)

I love the Locked Tomb series but Harrowhark has daddy issues with God, had a childhood crush on God's cryogenic partner, and is in love with God's daughter, not to mention that she's essentially a bone-bender. The religion on her home planet exists in a way that is technically against the will of the canon in-universe God, even. All of this to say, Harrowhark is heretical at minimum if not an outright witch. Terrible Catholic. Burn her.

Ronan Lynch

Uhh fun fact he saw the devil flash his father once, and that's one of the reasons he goes to church on Sundays <3

context for this scene from book 2: ronan is in church with his older brother declan, younger brother matthew, and ghost friend noah "Joseph Kavinsky isn’t someone I want you being around,” Declan added. “Don’t snort. I’m serious.” Ronan merely invested a look with as much contempt as he could muster. A lady reached over the top of Noah to pat Matthew’s head fondly before continuing down the aisle. She didn’t seem to care that he was fifteen, which was all right, because he didn’t, either. Both Ronan and Declan observed this interaction with the pleased expressions of parents watching their prodigy at work. Declan repeated, “Like, actually dangerous.” Sometimes, Declan seemed to think that being a year older gave him special knowledge of the seedier side of Henrietta. What he meant was, did Ronan know that Kavinsky was a cokehead. In his ear, Noah whispered, “Is crack the same thing as speed?” Ronan didn’t answer. He didn’t think it was a very church-appropriate conversation. “I know you think you’re a punk,” Declan said. “But you aren’t nearly as bad ass as you think you are.” “Oh, go to hell,” Ronan snapped, just as the altar boys broached the rear doors. “Guys,” Matthew pleaded. “Be holy.”

Gay Catholic streetracing farmer. Consumed by catholic guilt NOT because of the gay thing but because he can Create things in a way he thinks should be only God's business. Will literally roll up to mass on sunday morning still drunk and bloody.

THIS GOTH KID IS LITERALLY GOD. This is a god trapped in the body of a Catholic teen and if he ever stopped feeling Catholic guilt he’d end the world!!. How is your confession every week that you creating a whole new being? Babygirl the God is coming from inside the house

eldritch entity from beyond the mortal plane wants to be a Real Human Boy, becomes a real (ish!) human (ish!) boy, goes to mass every sunday

Gay boy got his crush an apartment above his church so he could have his two favorite things in one place

gay. I'm not caught up the the series but I went through the tag when the latest book came out and I remember seeing a quote that said he worried if his boyfriend would make it to heaven when he dies because of his agnostic tendencies.

Kid is like a dream warlock who creates psychic horrors and never goes to confession because why would he? and he’s gay

There are no words

basically ronan's powers are inherited from his dead father niall and it means he can bring anything from a dream into real life. so he's got this whole crisis about whether he is a living piece of blasphemy because men are not meant to have the powers of gods or whether he literally is god. which is not acceptable to him for a number of reasons but mostly because he hates himself. his love interest's name is adam and adam lives in a small apartment above a church which the book says focuses the objects of his worship neatly into one building. I love them both dearly. also, this entire page makes me feel like I'm going insane. Ronan Lynch believed in heaven and hell. Once, he’d seen the devil. It had been a low, late morning at the Barns when the sun had burned off the mist and then burned off the chill and then burned the edges off the ground until everything shimmered with heat. It never got hot in those protected fields, but that morning, the air sweated with it. Ronan had never seen cattle pant before. All of the cows heaved and stuck their tongues out as they frothed with the heat. His mother sent Ronan to put them in the shade of the cattle barn. Ronan had gone to the searing metal gate, and as he did, he’d glimpsed his father, already in the barn. Four yards away from him had stood a red man. He was not truly red, but the burned orange of a fire ant. And he was not truly a man, because of the horns and the hooves. Ronan remembered the alienness of the creature, how real it had been. Every costume in the world had gotten it wrong; every drawing in every comic book. They’d all forgotten that the devil was an animal. Looking at the red man, Ronan had been struck by the intricacy of the body, how many miraculous pieces moved smoothly in harmony, no different than his own. Niall Lynch had had a gun in hand — the Lynches had an enormous number of guns of all sizes — and just as Ronan had opened the gate, his father had shot the thing about thirteen times in the head. With a shake of its horns, the unharmed devil had presented its genitalia to Niall Lynch before bounding off. It was an image that had yet to leave Ronan. And so Ronan became a reverse evangelist. The truth burst and grew inside him, and it was laid upon him to share it with no one. No one was meant to see hell before they get there. No one should have to live with the devil. So many homilies on faith were ruined once you no longer required it for belief.

Our boy CHOOSES not to receive the Eucharist because he doesn’t believe he is worthy. The spiritual insight, the devotion, the fact that this teenager is worried he may have a mortal sin weighing on his soul…this boy isn’t just going through the motions, he’s putting work into this.

[hyperfixated-fan]

Hello, Ninjago fandom, while we impatiently wait for the second half of Crystalized to be released, may I interest you in some good old nostalgic shows with familiar Canadian voice actors to pass the time. Ironically, Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA) is in every single one of my suggested shows and in 3 of the 4, he’s got a lead role. XD

Also, I need more people to revive some of these old fandoms! Please hear me out while I info dump! The options get better as we go along since I firmly believe in saving the best for last. I hope you like my long ramble.

First off, we have Slugterra:

This show had a pretty good run with multiple seasons and specials. It’s a good action show and enjoyable for passing the time. I binge watched it while reading through my driver’s training stuff. A solid Saturday morning-esque show.

As far as notable characters and voice actors go, we’ve got:

Eli Shane voiced by Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA): he’s the main guy and very comparable to Lloyd since he’s got daddy issues. Poor guy spends forever trying to locate his dad while at the same time filling the role as hero and protector of the Caverns. Also, he’s the reason this show got so many female viewers. Those simps.

Dr. Thaddeus Blakk voiced by Mark Oliver (Garmadon’s VA): he’s the typical big bad villain type. A bit bland but it’s hilarious to listen to if you’re a Ninjago fan because all you end up hearing is Lloyd vs. Garmadon half the time.

Kord Zane voiced by Andrew Francis (Morro’s VA): he’s a troll and the muscle and mechanic of the main group. Not much to say about him. He’s a sweet, protective dude. Also, I just like that he’s got the name Kord Zane since I’m a huge Zane fan.

Trixie Sting voiced by Shannon Chan-Kent (Racer Seven’s VA): she’s neat and seems to be the second in command to Eli. She’s you’re typical strong female character type. Good news is that there’s no annoying trope that she is in love with the main guy though.

Pronto voiced by Lee Tockar (Borg’s VA): he fits the comedic relief trope really well. Unfortunately, he’s borderline annoying for me. I don’t have anything really notable to say about him. You just gotta tolerate him. Occasionally he has his uses.

Junjie voiced by Vincent Tong (Kai’s VA): he’s not a main character but I really love him and the Asian influence the show goes through when he’s around. Cool dude that also has so much trauma packed into him when you think about all he went through. You’ll understand if you watch.

Burpy is the iconic slug of the series. A 10/10 character. Loyal as ever and super adorable. Sassy when he wants to be.

Pros of this show:

Adorable side character slugs with awesome powers

Elemental slugs!!

a whole arc about trying to free a place from an evil emperor (sound familiar?)

Teaches against animal cruelty.

Shadow creatures that for once aren’t evil villains.

So many other familiar side characters with Ninjago VA’s. It’s honestly just fun to see how many familiar voices you can pick out.

Interesting concept, lore, and world building if you dig deep enough and overanalyze everything.

Cool fights and slug shootouts.

Action with a side of found family is always a plus.

Solid team dynamics and brotherly teasing.

A bonus is that there’s very little romance in this show. Very refreshing to see.

Next we have a forgotten classic, Class of the Titans:

This show had two seasons and had a decent ending. It definitely deserved more run time because there really aren’t that many animated shows about Greek Mythology that are kid friendly. A big main crew with a few familiar Ninjago voice actors sprinkled in for the fun of it. Another Saturday morning-esque show but with a better feel of having an overarching plot than Slugterra did in my opinion.

They have so many character tropes that create the whole main crew so I’m going to try to go through them quickly.

Jay voiced by Kirby Morrow (Cole’s VA): the level-headed leader. Very similar to how Cole started out as team leader. Also, it’s just funny for Ninjago fans to see a character named Jay be voiced by Cole’s voice actor.

Theresa voiced by Kelly Sheridan (Gayle Gossip’s VA or better known for playing Barbie): a psychic seer who is Jay’s love interest (reminds me of Barbie and the Nutcracker solely bc of the voice actors). I wish I liked her more, especially since she’s a seer like Zane. Honestly, neither girl characters really stand out to me but they’re nice to have around.

Atlanta voiced by Meghan Black in season one: the action archer girl who has super speed. She’s neat and very strong-willed. (Side note: I find it funny that every main character girl I’ve mentioned so far are all redheads.)

Odie voiced by Doron Bell Jr. (Griffin’s VA): the smart tech guy. He has his uses and sassy moments. It’s also funny to see what was considered high tech back in the mid 2000s.

Herry voiced by Ty Olsson: your typical strong, protective, big brother guy trope. He’s got a really awesome, scrappy grandma.

Neil voiced by Ted Cole: the self-absorbed guy who serves as comedic relief a good portion of the time. Some might find him annoying but he has his high points and is genuinely funny. He’s not a fighter at all and is dubbed “the lucky one.” And boy, is he lucky indeed.

Archie voiced by Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA): my personal favorite. He’s an occasional jerk but he’s genuinely an adorkable guy. I relate to his whole “wonky ankle” thing, but he’s a great warrior regardless (and the second fastest on the team? How?). He’s got a huge crush on Atlanta which is amusing and sometimes cringy to watch.

Cronus voiced by David Kaye: the main villain of the show. Typical wicked guy who wants to end the kids who are prophesied to defeat him. I know there’s a good number of simps for him. It’s hilarious how much this god loathes this group of kids but is also genuinely terrified of them, especially Jay.

Pros:

If you’re missing Cole’s voice actor, this is the show to watch.

The entire show is free on YouTube Very imaginative spin on some of the Greek gods like Dionysius to make it kid friendly. And wait til you see Hades.

Still, they aren’t afraid to show the gods can be petty and vengeful.

Greek mythology! What more could you want?

I personally love the way they showcase so many Greek characters and creatures. Is it sometimes off? Yes. Is it still enjoyable to watch? YES!

Interesting battles and solutions.

Will show death and the occasional bloody injury. (Not overtly graphic though so don’t worry.)

The poor kids, similar to Lloyd, are prophecy bound to defeat the evil villain and thus have their lives turned upside to become heroes fighting monsters. Theresa eventually throws a somewhat justified hissy fit over this.

Enjoyable characters and team dynamics. So much sibling teasing between everyone and it’s so relatable to watch.

Also, they’re just teens being teens so they do stupid stuff sometimes and that just makes it all the more fun to watch.

A bonus, there’s two girls on the team rather than your stereotypical one main girl trope.

A big favorite of mine, Storm Hawks:

Oh look, another red head character with green eyes. And he’s the lead character voiced by Sam Vincent! XD Here me out though, this show is actually great. If you can get past the funky character designs and animation, it’s a genuinely fun show. It’s so imaginative and for me, it ticks all the right tropes. I would like to say that if you’re a Ninjago fan, you just might be able to like Storm Hawks. It’s a show that I rewatch again and again and still enjoy it. Fans of it will say it ended to soon with only two seasons and an open conclusion that leaves room for more adventures. I wish there was more. The flow was good and I felt it followed a decent overarching plot with quirky filler episodes thrown in to establish the characters more.

Now as far as main characters go, we have a good mix of interesting ones. Yes, they fall into stereotypical archetypes but for some reason, I really like them:

Aerrow voiced by Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA: the young, ambitious Sky Knight of the Storm Hawks. He’s your typical, altruistic hero/leader/chosen one. I love how you can really see how much he cares for his team. He’s got a big legacy to live up to and you know what, he’s absolutely demolishing everyone’s limited expectations of him. This boy survived multiple fights with the supposedly deadliest warrior in the world.

Piper voiced by Chiara Zanni: she’s the intelligent one of the bunch and typically possesses the one brain cell they all share. She’s the navigator, crystal expert, and the second in command. In short, she’s an adorable nerd and my favorite despite having some out of character moments. I also like the little something something she’s got going on with Aerrow. Yes, it’s cliché but it’s open enough that you can interpret it romantically or platonically. And honestly, the way Piper is written, you could almost say she’s bi. But holy cow, that finale with her and Aerrow was everything! Love it.

Junko voiced by Colin Murdock (Ed’s VA aka Jay’s dad): the stereotypical gentle giant type. He’s sweet and strong but constantly doubts his ability because he was bullied. He’s similar to Kord from Slugterra in that he’s got muscle but also serves as the airship’s mechanic. He has a couple of spotlight episodes that do his character justice.

Finn voiced by Matt Hill (Hyper-Sonic’s VA aka that random disco head racer from Prime Empire): on the outside, when paired with Junko, they typically serve as the meat headed comic relief. However, when it comes down to it, Finn is selfless and will make the right choice as episodes have shown. He can get annoying but I highly appreciate that he knows how to buckle down and get a job done and he truly is a great sharpshooter.

Stork voiced by Scott McNeil (VA for many villains in Ninjago): one of the fan favorites for his doom and gloom sort of attitude. He’s the pilot and gives off emo vibes to me. A very relatable character for most pessimists. He’s the oldest of the crew full of kids but he sticks it out through all their wild adventures even if he is completely terrified while trying to survive. Still, he’s got a beserk button so don’t you ever think of touch his precious ship, the Condor. He can and will take out a complete armada.

Radarr voiced by Asaph Fipke: he’s Aerrow’s co-pilot and animal companion of the show. He’s very scrappy and has good intuition. A valuable member of the Storm Hawks. He even gets a couple of his own episodes to shine in.

Now, I gotta mention the villains too since there is a quirky handful of them:

Cyclonis voiced by Lenore Zann: she’s the lead villain and ruler of her kingdom at just 14 years old. She’s very powerful and very intimidating when she wants to be since she’s got a bunch of wacky crystal powers like Piper. I find her interesting just because she’s a young girl who serves as the main big bad villain versus previous shows where it’s a broad-shouldered middle aged guy in a black suit. I wish they showed more on her backstory but a decent villain nonetheless. Comparable to Harumi in that she’s a female kid villain who is deep down broken and lonely and in desperate need of therapy and a friend.

Dark Ace voiced by Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA): is the second in command to Cyclonis and is extremely loyal to her. He’s constantly getting beat by Aerrow and can never manage to exterminate him much to his annoyance. It’s hilarious watching their fights because it’s just Sam Vincent alternating between tones. He’s got cool red eyes and I do believe he also has a bit of a following among the female fans.

Ravess voiced by Cathy Weseluck (Patty Keys VA aka that random sales lady): she’s an archer who has a penchant for the violin. I love her leitmotif whenever she comes onscreen. Ambitious but still scared to turn on her 14 year old boss. She does play a helpful role I towards the finale.

Snipe voiced by Colin Murdock (Ed’s VA): he’s the brother of Ravess and serves as the big dumb muscle guy. I don’t really care for him but his sibling interactions with Ravess are funny.

Raptors voiced by a bunch of familiar VAs: I just had to mention this reptilian group because they are reminiscent of the Serpentine from Ninjago.

Pros:

Great side characters and fun episodes.

Good action and adventure vibes

The whole show is free on YouTube.

Again, world building and lore is very imaginative. It deserved a larger budget and more seasons.

Has your typical chosen/prophesied one narrative that we’ve all come to either love or hate.

Crystal magic (kinda like how we’re now on the season Crystalized)

Adorable main cast who all get a chance in the spotlight, and even the annoying ones do have their high points like I mentioned.

Ninjago VA’s are everywhere in this show too. And with the limited voices they have, they really make the most of it but it’s hilarious to see VA’s essentially talking to themselves onscreen.

And once again, there’s top notch team dynamics in this show with good sibling-like interactions between characters. They squabble but still make up and really care for each other’s wellbeing.

Found family trope is in this and it’s great and I’m a sucker for it. It’s heavily implied the three human kid heroes are orphans so there’s that lovely dose of angst I always love.

Something about Aerrow being a leader just hits right. He’s a great one even if he is just 14 years old.

Good balance between high stakes and humor. The main characters are kids and heroes and it shows with all the shenanigans they manage to throw themselves into.

Great finale. Trust me. The show gets better as you continue to watch it and the episodes get less disjointed.

Friends to lovers or just really close friends trope between Aerrow and Piper. I cannot stop gushing about how natural their dynamic feels and how they play off each other’s energy beautifully. They communicate openly and really well with each other. And if romance isn’t your thing, their bond can totally be seen as platonic.

Cyclonis is a curious villain character that is different from your stereotypical guy cartoon villain. I like her and her powers.

Huge bonus that Ninjago has struggled with doing well, love triangles. Storm Hawks has no place for that. In fact, it subverts that trope entirely! Piper does not act all jealous whenever there is another girl character around and this is a huge breath of fresh air from the pettiness many shows contain. Aerrow occasionally acts wary and annoyed when Piper gushes over stuck up guys, but it’s proven justified and he isn’t overprotective or obnoxious about it. Just cautious and comforting when things do go south.

And lastly, this underrated masterpiece, The Deep:

Great news, this show is still ongoing and recently released their 4th season. It’s got a decent overarching narrative of searching for a lost underwater city Lemuria. There are many filler episodes, but trust me, they are fun. Not gonna lie, I’m a huge sucker for any ocean animated shows. This one is just so funny and relatable. It’s got great family dynamics with many familiar Ninjago voice actors. The adventures and creatures are all so cool! It ties myth, mystery, and science all into one great show. The sci-fi fantasy vibe is amazing. But basically, my liking of this show is hugely centered on not just the creativity of it but the strong family dynamics that glues the entire show together. Unlike most shows where parents are absent or there’s only one, this cartoon portrays a lovely married couple and their kids. Seriously, how often does the chosen one/protagonist of the show actually get a decent childhood with loving parents?!

With characters, we have a small main cast with a handful of recurring side characters. This means, you gotta love the main characters:

Antaeus Nekton aka Ant voiced by Vincent Tong (Kai’s VA): he’s the excitable main protagonist child and chosen one of the family. He’s extremely curious and gets into trouble often, but fortunately for him, he’s got an intelligent engineering mind that helps him get out of trouble… most times. Fortunately for him though, he’s got a great family backing him up. I find him to be a likable character as far as protagonists go and good representation of annoying younger siblings.

Fontaine Nekton voiced by Ashleigh Ball (Sally’s VA aka that pink-haired girl from Crystalized): she’s the older sister character. Sometimes she acts as the only voice of reason onboard the ship. I find her extremely relatable. It’s clear that although Ant annoys her, she still very much loves him and will do anything to protect him and that is so wholesome. She’s got a crush on Finn who’s a slick teen pirate voiced by Sam Vincent (Lloyd’s VA) and most of the fandom really loves the flirty dynamic they have. I gotta admit, they are pretty cute together.

William Nekton aka Will voiced by Michael Dobson (VA for many Ninjago side characters): he is the dad and the muscle of the crew. Still, like everyone else, he’s smart. He’s super reasonable and a really great example of a good father and husband. He has his funny moments and craziness too though.

Kaiko Nekton voiced by Kathleen Barr (Misako’s VA): this woman is my personal favorite and I could gush on and on about how totally awesome she is. Unlike Misako, Kaiko is the most awesome mother ever to her kids and is fiercely protective of them. She has a wide skill set from being a submarine pilot, mechanic, and marine biologist. In short, she’s amazing and I’m a huge simp for her.

Jeffrey: he’s the adorable animal sidekick. He’s an intelligent, expressive fish and has helped saved the Nekton family on multiple occasions. Very relatable because he is cookie-motivated. Smarter than your average wannabe pirate.

Nereus voiced by Lee Tockar (Borg’s VA): he’s your typical mystical old dude with a long white beard. Essentially he’s the Wu of this show. Funny but infuriatingly cryptic at times.

Pros:

This show was based off comics so you can go read those. (Kaiko gets an awesome moment in those that I really wish they would have kept in the tv show.)

Vaguely based off the Incredibles.

Non-absent parents who are top notch and actually parent their kids fairly.

Submarines and marine life are always a plus in my book.

Family dynamics are on point. Seriously, this is top notch stuff right here. Also, sibling dynamics are so sweet.

Representation of a good solid marriage. Bonus points because it’s interracial, making their kids mixed. All-round good representation.

Good musical score. (Not as good as Ninjago’s but still pretty good.)

The whole family is smart and super skilled but it shows that they still make mistakes and are flawed humans just like everyone else. Even the parents aren’t shown to be completely infallible and land in their own sticky situations plenty of times and I find that super neat and good of the writers to do.

Great mind-boggling adventures.

The villains are wacky yet endearing sometimes.

There’s villain that is reminiscent of Morro. He’s even got the same voice actor and goes through the same arc of being all jealous of the chosen one.

”Have faith in the fish.” Jeffrey is great animal companion. Who knew you could actually make a fish work as a good character.

Just huge bonus overall with this show because of the solid family representation we’ve got going on here.

Basically, to sum everything up, GO WATCH THESE SHOWS! And let me know if you enjoy them, I would love to hear your thoughts on them.

[erodasfishtacos]

It’s Just Me (mini blurb)

if you enjoyed this fic - PLEASE reblog, rec, like, and come chat with me about the fic!

if you like my work and can donate as i do this for free - please consider donating to my ko-fi.

———————

It was a terrible twos kind of day. The kind of day when YN can’t tote Ivy along to a charity organization brunch because she would meltdown.

Harry had her in his office with him, she was sitting on a blanket Harry had laid out, and was quietly playing with her stuffed animals (mostly seals.)

Occasionally, she would babble to herself and get pissed of at her inatimate playmates, ending in her tossing it to the side.

He caught himself just staring at her, smiling as he watches the little human he and his soulmate created right in front of him.

When his phone rings, he automatically picks it up, professionally stating, “Styles.”

“Hi, this is Dan from Payroll,” The guys voice was already shaking and Harry knew he was about to get really pissed off.

“How can I help you?” He asks in a tone that’s was definitely did not sound like he wanted to provide any assistance.

There is a pregnant pause before Dan nearly stutters, “Er, I accidentally missed reviewing the marketing departments hours and they did not receive their last paycheck.”

Harry takes a very deep breathe because he wants to do what he normally would - scream through the phone at this idiot.

However, he can’t because his curly haired little baby is playing with her toys in the middle of the office with a smile.

“Please come up to my office,” Harry replies curtly before hanging up.

He gets up, goes over to his daughter, and squats in front of her, “Ivy, baby.”

She looks up at him with a toothy grin before reaching over to hand him a stuffed seal, “Play, daddy.”

Harry thumbs over a stray curl on her forehead, “Daddy can’t, my love. I need y’to go with Granny Dor for a little.”

Ivy had been very clinging to both YN and Harry recently. She had a fit when YN dropped her off, despite how happy she was to see her dad.

Her brows furrow, lips purse, and Harry has to laugh because she looks like a carbon copy of him with the sour face.

“Oh, no mean looks t’daddy,” He hums with his own frown, “S’just for a moment, m’dove.”

“No.”

“Ivy, y’need to listen.”

And Harry knows it coming, she sucks in a huge breathe and then just lets out a scream in protest of him.

“Ivy Elizabeth Styles, y’do not scream. Y’know better. Are we going to have to take a timeout or are you going to go sit nice with Dor?” Harry’s voice is still softer than he’d use with any of him employees but extremely firm to her.

“No timeout, daddy,” She mumbles, her volume decreasing significantly as she lowers her gaze from her father’s.

“Alright, then c’mon. Thank you for listening,” Harry praises, gathering up her toys for her and leading her into his waiting room where Dorothy is typing away on her computer.

“Dor, Dan is coming up and I need to have a private meaning. Will y’watch her for a little?”

Ivy is already clambering up into her lap, into the warmth of her arms, and nuzzling in - because Granny Dor spoiled her silly.

Harry rolls his eyes, muttering, “And you and YN say I spoil her too much. Bloody ridiculous.”

Dorothy just shoos him away, readjusting Ivy’s bow, and combing through her hair softly to simmer her down a little.

Dan trails in solemnly soon after to face his inevitable doom.

He sees his boss’ daughter perched on the secretary’s lap and he wonders how such a sweet little thing could be created from the demon of a man.

As Harry and Dan meet, Ivy gets wriggly and squirms off of Dorothy’s lap.

“Stay close,” She murmurs to the toddler as she picks up her phone to answer a call for Harry.

Of course, Ivy doesn’t listen, and she noticed that the door to her father’s office is cracked open just the littlest bit.

It’s enough for her to slip through the space between the heavy doors and toddles on, she’s blocked by the leather couches so Harry can’t see her.

“I have givin’ you so many fuckin’ chances!” Harry seethes angrily at his employee. His tone was more like a growl than anything else.

Ivy pauses, eyes widening in fear as she hears her dad speak in a frightening manner she’s never heard before.

“I…There was a coding error that I had been distracted with, it won’t happen again,” Dan insists, knowing he had actually committed a fireable offense.

“You are absolutely correct because you’re fucking fired,” Harry replies, no wavering in his raspy register.

“That’s bullshit and you know it!” Dan explodes, “It’s unfucking fair treatment! It was one mistake, you fuckin’ asshole!”

There’s a moment of silence.

“I can fuckin’ show you unfair treatment. Get the fuck out of my office and learn how to do your goddamn job,” Harry retorts, his voice rising as well.

Ivy is stuck in her spot, frozen in surprise at hearing the arguing and how mad her father sounded, voice echoing through the room.

“You listen to me-“

“Get the fuck out of my office!” Harry booms furiously, this employee managing to get a rise out of him.

“I was ju-“

Both the men pause when they hear a wail from behind the sofa and the sound of Ivy plopping herself on the ground.

Harry instantly is out from behind his desk and going to round the sofa in a flash with a rose of panic in his chest.

His heart drops when he sees his baby looking up at him with fear in her watery eyes and she’s literally shaking.

“Oh, baby. Did y’hear daddy bein’ loud?” Harry murmurs in his sweetest, comforting voice - uncaring of his employee hearing him.

Harry expects her to nod sadly and ask for a cuddle but she instead wriggles backwards when he goes to reach for her - out of his reach.

“Ivy, little dove, s’just y’daddy,” He tries again, sitting down in front of her - doesn’t even look up as Dan leaves quietly.

She’s scared though and has had never felt worse in his life as his daughter backs away from him until she’s getting to her wobbly feet.

He tries again, reaching his arms out, “Ivy Elizabeth, s’just daddy. M’sorry I scared you, bub.”

Ivy doesn’t budge, crying loudly with her face pinched up as hot tears run down her soft chubby cheeks.

Dorothy appears with a worried look, “I apologize, I thought she was by the table.”

“S’not your fault I’m a shitty father,” Harry mutters, standing back up and roughly brushing off his trousers.

“Oh Harry, she’s just a little frightened,” Dorothy hums, picking the girl up when she toddles quickly over to her.

Her dad trails over, “Ivy, m’love. Can you look at daddy?”

She refuses, digging her face into the woman’s shoulder, curls bouncing fiercely as she clings onto her.

Harry loved to be feared. Not like this though. Not by the child he’d literally jump in front of a train for without a second thought.

He would rather have her screaming, pitching fits, throwing toys rather than this. She was so scared that she wouldn’t even look at him.

“Let me take her on a little stroll, okay? See if I can calm her down a bit.”

—

Harry waits patiently for Dorothy to arrive back but he automatically hears his daughter’s steady stream of sniffles and whimpers.

He goes out to the waiting room to see her reentering the room, she sighs, “I think it’s time to call mummy.”

Harry had no idea how he was going to explain this to his wife. He was I trouble and he knew he deserved it.

“Hey H, is the bab okay?” YN greets warmly, chattering in the background.

“Er, she’s okay, just upset. Ivy accidentally walked in on me flipping out and firing an employee. Now she’s scared. Dor tried to calm her down and she doesn’t want to be near me right now.”

YN’s next words were calm, Harry however did not miss the sharp edge when she replies, “I’ll be there in fifteen.”

Then she hangs up on him.

Which she really never does unless she is really really upset.

—

When YN arrives, Ivy is sat on Dorothy’s lap with puffy eyes and her thumb tucked between her full lips, popping it out when she sees her mother.

“Mumma!” Ivy shrieks, tears beginning streaming down her face as she impatiently waits for her to cross the room and gives her a soft kiss to the forehead.

“Hi baby, give mummy one minute and then we’ll leave okay?” YN murmurs soothingly, thumbing of some of the tears.

Ivy nods but is standing next the secretary’s desk, waiting patiently with her thumb going right back between her lips again.

Harry’s sitting at his large oak table, looking like a guilty puppy as his wife comes in with a disapproving look on her face.

“Baby, m’sorr-“

“What the fuck, Harry? Why is our daughter out there terrified right now?” YN demands, crossing her arms to prove her anger.

“Some fuckin’ idiot messed somethin’ up and Ivy walked in while I cursed him out and fired him. She was hiding behind the couch. It was an accident,” He defends, bristling a bit.

“Even if the door was shut, she would have still heard you. You knew better than to act like that around our daughter.”

“I had to fire him,” Harry makes the lame excuse because he knows he’s in the wrong and he’s not always great at admitting he is.

“You were supposed to have Ivy for two hours and this happens. I have her all day everyday and I’ve need had an issue with controlling myself in front of others!” YN yells (quietly) at him.

“What the fuck is tha’ supposed to mean? Y’calling me a bad father? Y’have her all day with her because I work so that you can stay at home with her.”

YN rolls her eyes, “Well thank god for that, she’d be cursing and screaming at people all day everyday if she was with you all the time.”

Harry is thoroughly pissed at his wife and she is equally just as furious with him - it doesn’t happen often but when it does it’s bad.

“Y’got some fuckin’ nerve. Our baby is polite, well-mannered because of me too! Not just you, fuckin’ claiming all her good qualities,” He replies with a snarl.

“Don’t talk to me that way,” YN bites back, “I’m not one of your employees. Neither is Ivy despite you talking like that in front of her.”

Now she was just trying to push his buttons and it was well onto it’s way of working.

“Y’bein’ fuckin’ ridiculous! It was a accident and you’re acting like I did it on purpose! Fuckin’ hell!” He raises his voice in frustration.

“I don’t know who the fuck you think you are raising your voice at me but I’m leaving,” YN tells him, giving him one final glare before storming out of the office.

“Fuck!” He grunts, smacking cup of pens from his desk before slamming his fist on the desk.

—

Ivy was waiting patiently, whimpering when she sees her mum, and gesturing to be picked up, “It’s past your nap time, Vee.”

“Nap,” She lisps sadly, instantly curling into then familiarness that is her mother. Eyes instantly fluttering shut.

“Thank you, Dor,” YN whispers, blowing her a kiss, before trekking out of the office with the exhausted little girl.

—

Harry can’t handle the rest of the day, wants to go home, and make amends with his wife which leads him to heading out only an hour after them.

He finds YN in the den with the baby monitor propped on the coffee table, she’s watching a horror movie with a smoothie in hand.

“Hi, m’heart,” Harry murmurs cautiously, loosening up his tie until it falls limp around his neck.

She glances over at him, sarcasm lacing her tone,“So you do know how to talk without yelling at me, hmm?”

His face falls, frowning, “Hey, lovie - don’t be like tha’. Y’gonna let me apologize?”

“Come scratch my back and I’ll hear you out,” She hums, keeping a serious face.

“Y’drive a hard bargain, m’heart. Show me y’tits,” Harry begins to smile, striding over and getting her no time before he’s pulling off her shirt and sports bra.

He sits down then gently lays her down on her tummy and she rests her head in his lap, cheek pressed against his thigh.

“I shouldn’t have done that, I wasn’t thinkin’. Now I’m worried she’s gonna hate me forever,” Harry mumbles, using his blunt nails to trace up and down her back.

“You’re her favorite person. She’ll always love you more than anything,” YN tells him seriously, arching when he scratches an extra itchy spot.

“I hope so. I love her more than anythin’. A little mixture of how much we love each other. How much we worked to get her,” He sighs softly.

—

YN dozed off and Harry tucks a blanket around her bare chest.

When the baby monitor alerts that Ivy had woke up after quite a long nap, he takes a deep breath before walking up the staircase to his fate.

He’s preparing himself for her to scream and cry when she sees her monster of a father because he’d scared her so horribly.

But his mini just widens her green eyes and he looks at his world with bated breath, waiting for the scream or tears.

Instead, she just dimples happily at her father, and squeals with excitement, “Daddy! Hi Daddy, miss you!”

And just like that….

They’re best friends again.

—-

Enjoy! Come talk to me!! 💕❣️💕❣️💕❣️

[stripper-patrick]

Next Lifetime 💫Michael B. Jordan pt 1.

Warnings: smut, fluff, kids, sneaky link turned into family, angst, crying, 18+, NSFW gifs, series

Tags: @rebellious-desires @mrsbanreswillseeyou @eclecticblkgirl @designerwriterchic @bvssmob

Relationship: Michael B. Jordan x black plus sized reader (Azina/Z)

<4 years ago>

I’m throwing my ass back to the music just enjoying myself during this time. I’ve had at least 4 shots and I’m feeling all of them.

I feel someone press up behind me and it’s my best friend Michael whose clearly off the Henny just as much as I am. He grinds against me and as I’m working my hips I feel his dick stiffen. A boldness surged through me, or maybe that’s the liquor, and I stand up turning to him sealing a kiss. I’ve always wanted him no doubt I just never knew how to tell him. I guess being drunk is the best way. His hands grab at my waist then snake to my ass. His sweet Hennessy flavored lips are getting me even more drunk but with lust this time. The glisten of his plump lips being out the diamonds in his grill set plastered perfectly on his teeth.

“Let’s go to my house” I nod agreeing with his request and he grabs my hand leading me outside. He hails down a cab and opens the door letting me get on first. He smacks my butt on the way in and I giggle.

“322 Barron Street please” it’s about a 15 minute ride from here.

The driver begins his route and Michael starts kissing my neck and his hand slips down my shorts. My panties are beyond soaked and now he’s rubbing my clit making me whine.

His hand wraps around my throat whispering on my ear “stay quiet ma” he rubs again and as soon as the driver turns the corner into Michael’s loft I’m bussing all over his fingers biting the bottom of my lip trying to stay quiet.

He wraps his hand around my mouth flicking my clit faster making me shake harder. He pulls out his coated fingers placing them in my mouth. I suck off my own sweet juices and he grabs my by the throat kissing me tasting myself off my tongue. The driver clears his throat and we stop giggling and getting out. He tips the driver and walks past me opening the door. As soon as he gets the door open my pants are already unbuckled and halfway off.

“Damn hold on mamas” he slurs. We finally make it up to his nicely decorated bedroom and I’m pushed backwards flying back first on the bed. Michael comes on top of me and I flip us over grinding down on his already rock hard dick. He grabs a handful of behind moaning in my mouth. I move down to his neck where I kiss it sloppily. We stop kissing for a moment and I remove my shirt while he does the same. I move down pulling down his boxers and pants in one motion wasting no time swirling my tongue on the tip of his leaking dick. A low moan fills the room and I wrap my lips around the entire tip and push my head down letting it hit the back of my throat. I let it get wet then go back up to sucking on the tip while my right hand jerks the base and my left hand cups his balls. I come off with a string of saliva and I use my palm to rub on the top directly allowing the slick saliva to give him pleasure. His stomach caves and a loud moan erupts from Michael as he looks down holding vicious eye contact with me.

“Fuck Z” I continue going to town until he grabs me by the throat pulling me up to his mouth. Michael’s tongue roams my mouth fighting for dominance as he pulls me on top of him. I grab his throbbing dick pushing it inside of my aching pussy feeling him expand my walls gracefully. He leans back laying his head on the pillow as I gasp sinking down on him until our hips meet. I place my hands on his chest and sit on my feet rocking my hips along his shaft. His eyes flutter shut as I work my magic swirling my hips in a sloppy drunken circle. He bites his lip while one hand grabs the back of my head pulling my sweaty forehead to his. The other hand grabs a handful of my ass pulling me down. His dick fills my pussy completely making me gasp. Without missing a second Keith grabs both sides of my head keeping deadly eye contact with me and thrusts his hips beating my pussy from below. I let out a mewl holding his biceps while digging my acrylics into them. I bite my lip as he obliterates hot spots I didn’t even know were there.

My entire body feels like it’s on fire as after he thrusts he gives it aches and caves for more. “You like that? You like being daddy’s lil bitch” he moans pounding me out. Michael moves his hands wrapping his hand around my throat pulling me further and growling in my ear. I try to push away as the pleasure is starting to overwhelm me and he holds me by my hips keeping me right where he wants me. The only that can be heard in the room is the slushing sound of my wetness, the clapping of my ass and his balls slapping against my ass. My legs shake already as he continues. My pussy soaks everything underneath me as I let out a struggled moan cumming harder than I’ve ever came with any other man before. Michael pulls out pushing me up onto his face while jerking himself off in the process. He wraps his hands around my hips tasting the beautiful mess he made. My body jerks and my hand instinctively moves to his head as I roll my body on his tongue. He moans at my taste sucking and lapping on my clit. I smile getting off his face and back on his dick bucking my hips wildly. Michael guides my hips keeping himself as deep as possible. He begins thrusting up again at a fast pace making my eyes roll to the back of my head. He growls again giving me a fair warning that he’s about to cum. Without thinking I scream “cum inside this pussy daddy”

I’m aching from his blows. I sit up and keep bouncing at the same pace as he holds my hips tensing up. His seed spills inside of me and I watch his arch his back when I clench my pussy creating a suction. He moans pressing into my hips more.

Michael sits up kissing me and giving me a hard spank to my right ass cheek. His dick throbs inside of me as our mixtures leaks out dripping past his balls and onto the sheets. Drunkenly I lay on top of him giving him lazy kisses. Time and liquor consumes us and before I know it we’re both asleep in each other’s arms.

…

I wake up with a headache the size of the room. I feel like if I move too fast I’ll throw up. I feel someone warmth next to me and I pause. Who did I go home with last night? What happened? I’m aching between my legs but my conscience tells me not to be scared. I look behind me seeing Michael fast asleep. I sigh in comfort knowing I’m safe. He stirs in his sleep opening his eyes and he sees me. “Morning”

“Morning” I move my legs and notice they’re weak. I pull back the covers and we’re both completely naked. Oh shit. I jump up to the best of my ability and he sits up too

“Mike what did we do last night”

“Well using my context clues we had sex” he says rubbing his eyes

“Michael do you not see an issue with that? You have a girlfriend”

“I know but I mean if I’m being honest I’ve always had feelings for you Z and clearly you feel the same way” he states. I grab my underwear shaking my head.

“Mike that’s not the point you knew we shouldn’t have acted on it especially since you’re in a relationship. This could absolutely ruin our friendship. Lemme ask you this what if we go get together and break up then what you know I’m not friends with my exes. If you can be cool with your ex y’all were never in love or still are in love. There’s no in between” he looks at me with his head hanging low. He knows exactly where I’m coming from. “I’m not tryna lose you as a person in general” Mike goes in the bathroom brushing his teeth and peeing.

I collect my clothes putting them back on and Mike throws on some basketball shorts and a t-shirt he grabs some slides and his car keys . Luckily my car is already at home since Michael and his girl Lori picked me up.

“Z I’m sorry. I know things went too far but I’m glad we at least know how we feel about each other” he says “and I don’t regret what happened last night” I nod and get in his car. He gets in the drivers seat taking off and taking me home.

…..

Lori decided to have a pool party today to celebrate Mike for his birthday. Of course he invited me and being his best friend I wouldn’t miss it for the world. Plus it’s at his new house and I’ve never seen it before. Granite we haven’t talked much or seen each other at all since our ordeal a couple weeks ago. In fact this is the first time I’ve actually seen him since that day.

I walk through their beautiful house with a bottle of champagne in my hand. I see Lori in the kitchen. Honestly me and her have never really been that close. I never really cared for her but I was always cordial with her. “Hey Lori I brought this for y’all” she looks at me taking the champagne without even saying thank you. Bougie bitch. Don’t get me wrong I’m bougie too but best believe I’m as humble and as thankful as they come. I guess that’s why me and Mike are best friends. We’re the same.

I roll my eyes and my heels click outside where I see a bunch of people lounging in the pool and on the sides with drinks in their hand. My other best friend Lamia greets me with open arms. Her perfume makes me nauseous and dizzy “Hey girl” she smiles

“Hey” I say trying to hold my breakfast down.

“Mike is over there. Have you and him talked since then?” As soon as I got home that day I got ready for work and told Lamia what happened. I shrug my shoulders as an answer.

“Only small talk and I’ve low key been trying to avoid him just so the awkward tension doesn’t arise” I say

“Makes sense” Michael begins walking over and I stride a little further away until he catches me.

“Hey ladies” he hugs lamia and I’m next. I smell his cologne and melt. “you want a drink Z” I shake my head

“I don’t feel too hot right now so I’ll stick with water for the day” he nods eyes lingering on me for longer than a second. Lori comes out running his bare back and our contact is broken. While Lori begins talking to him I slip away downing the rest of my water. The nausea is finally gone and I sit on the lounge chair going on my phone. I put on my sunglasses shielding my eyes.

While I’m relaxing in the sun I notice Michael keeps staring at me. I see the small bulge in his shorts and I can’t help but bite my lip, mouth water at the taste of his dick down my throat.

A mid-height dark skin man starts walking my way and I see he has a pearly white smile similar to Michael’s. I get a better glimpse of his face. His name is Jayson. I’ve heard about him before. I heard he’s a player and he sleeps with anything that moves.

He sits next to my feet flashing his smile at me. I sit up with a small smile on my face. “Hey I’m Jayson Mikes friend”

“Yea I know. I’m Z”

“What’s that short for”

“Azina” he smiles scooting closer. I glance up seeing Mikes eyes never leaving me.

“That’s beautiful. Fitting for a beautiful woman” he bites his lip. I take a deep breath and take my sunglasses off. I stare directly into Michael’s eyes and he’s fuming. Dimples are prominent in his cheeks, nose flared, biceps flexed from how tense he is. Jayson moves even closer and that’s when Michael comes over.

“Hey Jay what y’all talking about?” He interjects with his nose held high. A small rage burns in my stomach at how he completely ruined my chance at something. Even if I was just playing Jaysons game right back at him.

“Her name. It’s pretty”

“Oh yea the two ‘A’s in her name stands for aggravated assault. She’s crazy man she beat niggas” he laughs. He’s not fully wrong “but she’s my kinda crazy. Speaking of Azina can I speak to you privately please? Jay you don’t mind right? Course not be right back” before I even have a chance to protest he grabs my wrist and my panties are soaked by the time we enter the glass double doors of his house that Lori happens to be staying in. Just hearing him call my name rather than my nickname has me wanting to be on my knees on this cold marble floor.

“What the hell is your issue?” I ask yanking my arm away. He grabs me again taking me upstairs through the neatly decorated white hallway. We get into his gold coated marble bathroom where he locks the door. I lean against the counter and he folds his arms “why have you been avoiding me”

“I-“

“And don’t lie to me” he asserts his dominance making my clit throb. Silence and heavy thick sexual tension fill the air and I look down at my long pink acrylic nails. He steps closer sealing any space between me and him. His large hand wraps around my throat making me bite my lip “you like seeing me get all jealous? Shit makes you wet mama?”

“Yes” I whimper. And just like that I’m putty in his hands. He pulls me up to his plump lips placing a wet kiss on them. Michael pulls off my duster of a swimsuit coverup. His large hands play with my breasts and my hand moved to his hard on. He’s rock solid now. His hand moves from my breast to my bikini bottoms rubbing my clit. My hips hunk and my hands move to his bicep as his plump lips kiss my neck. My body jerks as his thick fingers slide into my hole with ease. He begins pressing my g-spot like a button making me lose my breath. Michael moves up to my ear whispering “you’re mine”

He pulls his fingers out and sucks them dry turning me around some I’m facing the huge mirror above the sink. I grab the ledge bracing myself as he rolls my bottoms down spanking me in the process. I spread my cheeks feel his warm hard dick press inside of me. He fills me up and holds my hips bouncing me back to meet his thrusts. His breaths become heavy and ragged and my mouth drops open but nothing comes out.

Michael is pressing right on my g-spot making me lose my breath. “Daddy” I whimper.

“That’s my girl take all this shit. You wanna flirt with other niggas ima show you who you belong to” he wraps his hand around my throat quickening his pace. My eyes squeeze shut and my moans get louder. The sounds of our moans and my ass clapping fills the room but we have to keep it quiet so no one comes up here and finds us.

“You like when daddy fill you up bitch?”

“Yes I love it so much” my legs begin shaking as my orgasm approaches fast like a train. He gets close to my ear still pounding me out against the marble counter.

“Look at me when I make you cum” I bite my lip and his grip tightens on my neck. I open my eyes to the best of my ability as my entire body seizes in front of him. My body is on fire and he chuckles biting his lip “you look so fucking pretty taking all this dick like a good little whore”

I whimper jerking around and he pulls out watching my body tense up and convulse. He smacks my already shaking ass. Michael turns me around again putting me on the counter and he gets on one knee licking my pussy. He slurps you the mess he made moaning at the taste. I watch as he pulls my pussy lips back making sure to get as much of my clit as possible. My body writhes from still being sensitive and I grab the back of his head pushing him further in me. I pull off my bikini top rubbing my nipples while grinding on his face. My head falls back and he gives small licks making me even crazier than before. Michael comes up kissing my lips. I can taste myself on his tongue. He taps his dick on my clit before inserting himself again. I wrap my arms around his shoulders as he wastes no time taking me to Poundtown.

His short nails claw down my back and he buries his head in my neck. “That’s it daddy right there” my nails take through his short waves as his hips ripple through me. My moans uncontrollably get louder and he covers my mouth pounding me harder “can’t scream now can you baby?” I whimper eyes rolling to the back of my head as I squirt on his dick “that’s what I want fuck I’m bout to cum” his growls get louder and he kisses me moaning. His body shakes when he leaks inside of me. My nails scrape down his back and he empties his load inside of me.

He stays inside of me staring deep into my eyes. I can’t help this feeling anymore but I need to for the sake of our friendship. Michael’s catches me in a kiss and for a split second I ignore my feelings and kiss him back. As if he were really mine. That thought stops me from going any further “I’m sorry for avoiding you”

“I understand mamas” he kisses me again and pull out grabbing a towel he wipes off my pussy and leans down placing a kiss on my clit making me gasp. I chuckle getting off the counter with his help. My legs shake and I laugh. I grab my clothes putting them back on and making sure I look like I did before I came up here.

“Mike” I hear Lori call from downstairs. To the best of my ability I walk to the door but before I open it Michael grabs my arm kissing me again. This one was more passion than lust. I smile pulling away and open the door. To see Lori coming in. I turn around and turn him around quickly “so this is the master bathroom?” I look at him

“Yea it’s marble counters and the gold trim it’s my favorite and there’s the waterfall shower in there” we walk towards the shower acting like he was explaining me the layout of the bathroom the whole time. I hear loris heels click in the bathroom “baby the boys are looking for you at the pool” he turns around nodding

“Ard come on Z” We walk past Lori and her eyes linger on us.

Me and Mike walk outside and he can’t stop staring at me. He stands at the front of the bar with a microphone “I wanna thank every one for coming out. I wanna thank Lori for putting this together couldn’t have done this without you babe” that word ‘babe’ leaves a stinging mark on my heart as Lori steps up beside her man. She kisses him and then looks at me. I walk backwards dipping out from the crowd. I go inside and grab the champagne I brought. This bottle wasn’t cheap so if they won’t drink it I will. I pour myself a glass and start sipping it. Michael comes in and once again it’s just us alone.

“I’m sorry”

“Don’t be sorry. Look Michael as much as we both want it us being together might never happen simply because you and Lori are a thing and y’all are basically destined for marriage”

“Now you know I’ve been about you and only you for a while”

“I can’t tell cause I’m still single and you’re in a relationship” I sigh “I’m leaving this house is beautiful but you need to figure out what you really want” I extend my arms and give him a hug. He plants a kiss on my neck Mumbling the words I’m sorry again.

I grab my champagne and leave the house with a heavy heart and a cloudy mind. That nauseous feeling is back.